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Earlier Today, Josh talks to "the newest superstar to make his debut on Velocity", Frankie Kazarian: "Well, bro, my thoughts are - things have to change around here. We need something new, we need the future, of wrestling, and the future is now. Now, Josh, you know that wrestling's all about era and generations of superstars - you have your superstars of the past, guy like Hulk Hogan, and Bret 'the Hitman' Hart, legends of our business. You've got your superstars of the present, guys like Batista and Triple H and Kurt Angle, incredible athletes. And you got your superstar of the future, me! And I've proven that all over the world, and now I'm here to prove it where it counts, the WWE. You can thank me later, 'cause The Future Frankie Kazarian has arrived."

Nunzio (175 pounds) vs Frankie Kazarian (220 pounds) - your announcers are Romero and Josh. Josh's hair looks dumb. Frankie's music is dumb. Call me crazy (you're CRAZY!) but Frankie isn't outweighing Nunzio by nearly 50 pounds. Josh runs down the list of places Frankie's wrestled in: "Japan, Europe, Trinidad, Australia" - Trinidad? I'm already hating on Frankie before the match starts, just because he's essentially replacing guys I enjoyed who got dropped in the last two weeks, even though he was signed far before the purge. It's completely unfair, but hey, I didn't book it this way. Good thing he's a heel. Your ref is Nick. Circle. Lockup, Nunzio with a waistlock, takedown, front facelock, Frankie up to a waistlock, switch, Frankie backs him into the corner, clean break? Back elbow, armdrag. Frankie dos a bit of heel posing, and gets a reaction from the floor section. Nunzio catches him by surprise with a dropkick to the back, and armdrags him out. Nunzio out after him and throwing him in, Frankie tries to go out the other side, but Nunzio grabs a leg and pulls him back. Sweep takes Frankie down to the mat, and Nunzio is content to wait for Frankie to get up so he can hiptoss him into a cross arm breaker. Frankie rolls backwards and up to his feet, but the armbar is still on. Whip, reversed, Frankie's tilt-a-whirl powerslam is reversed into a fujiwara armbar. Nunzio really all over the arm, even if the announcers aren't really noticing. They are calling the match more because it's Frankie's debut. Corner whip by Nunzio, Nunzio charges with splash, but Frankie slips out and snaps Nunzio's neck over the top rope. Frankie with a slingshot legdrop one two no. Corner whip, Nunzio goes down. Josh knows where Frankie's wrestled (including Trinidad!), knows who he was trained by, knows where he is from even though Chimel didn't bother announcing it, and says he doesn't know much about his in-ring style. Frankie with a running partial headstand dropkick to the chest, one two no. Neck vice. Frankie sorta somehow has him still in the hold as they stand up and Nunzio punches up. Nunzio ducks under a clothesline, tries a backdrop, can't get it, gets a small package instead, one two no. Kazarian with a weird looking dropkick (camera angle shields us from seeing how bad it was) and now on top of Nunzio with mounted punched. Chinlock, while Frankie explains he's the future once again. Nunzio battling up. Announcers switched to full SD! shill mode about halfway into Frankie's control segment. Frankie shot off, back with a reverse neckbreaker hold, holding it forever before doing the neckbreaker. Wait, who was hurt there? They're both acting dead. How odd. Kazarian up and throwing punches, but Nunzio evades and elbows Frankie in the back a few times. Whip, backdrop. Clothesline. Clothesline. Sidewalk slam one two no. Arrivederci, but the announcers aren't going to even call it - one two NO. Hey, now Josh calls it. Nunzio setting up the Sicilian Slice, but Kazarian ducks away. Frankie misses on a punch (c'mon now), Nunzio forces him into the ropes, works him over with two quick chest slaps, whip, quick reverse into a spinning fisherman's buster, one two three. (4:56) Josh tries the "the Future is arrived" line again. Frankie gets more promo time: "And that is exactly why I'm the Future - and the future looks good!" Romero: "Not a bad way to start a career, on Velocity..." Says you.

Tonight: Chris Benoit vs William Regal. Well, that could be okay.

Simon Dean (Clearwater, FL, 220 pounds w/bag) vs Mike Kruel (Worchester, MA, 228 pounds, already in the ring) - So are the other wrestlers supposed to know Simon Dean is the same guy as the person in the bWo? Are we supposed to know? Are we supposed to remember the bWo at all? Your ref is Charles. Oh boy, Simon is going to talk. "For you people who don't know my name, and all of you should, my name is Simon Dean. And it's a good thing I'm here tonight, because from the look of this crowd, the lazy days of summer are full of fat. I have changed so many pathetic lives on RAW and Heat [many more on Heat], I can not see why I can't do the same thing here on SmackDown! and Velocity. And, tonight, I'm going to start with you. [He's talking to Mike] See, here's how this works: I'm going to offer you this patented Simon System, because, uh, I don't know if you know this or not, but a match with me, it's not a exactly a walk on the treadmill, because, uh, I'm undefeated. [huh - even Kruel doesn't buy it] So I suggest you take this bar and give it your best shot, or, Choice B, I can force feed it to you. The choice is yours, man." Kruel's choice is - to swat the bar out of the ring. Kruel's yelling at Simon, but Simon still has the mic. "Your choice!" Slap to the face by Simon, ad we're on. Forearm to the back, forearm, whip, back elbow. Josh loves Simon Dean and the Simon System. Simon charges, Kruel moves, Simon hits the corner. Mike with a hiptoss, back elbow, right, right, whip, quick reverse into a STO. Simon seems angrier than usual. Stomps and kicks. Mike's stood up so Simon can use shoulders to the midsection. Now Charles is used as a buffer for a cheap shot. Simon manages to argue with Charles and kick Mike at the same time. Simon suplex - no, Kruel with a small package for one. Simon up first, Kruel punching Simon away. Josh points out's Simon's watch. Simon with a choke and push ups. Multi-tasking. Simon puts on a STF Surfboard for fun, stopping it with a Curb Stomp. One two NO. Simon with a chinlock/hammerlock combo. Kruel elbowing out, but Simon forearms him down. Whip, head down too soon, Frankie kicks him in the face. Simon with an atomic drop, clothesline, one two no. Kruel trying for a German suplex, but Simon blocks whip, clothesline. Simon checks his pulse and screams. Simon sets up - spinning fireman's carry one two three (3:35) Josh and Romero say it's the "Simonizer". Josh: "Simon Dean is welcomed every week here on Velocity." Well, yea. Simon makes good on his force feeding. Raise his arm.

Up Next: Batista vs OJ

SmackDown Live
07/17 - Ocean City, MD [SD! Live]
07/19 - Baltimore, MD [SD!]
07/24 - Buffalo, NY [GAB]
07/26 - Rochester, NY [SD!]
07/30 - Bangor, ME [SD! Live]

JBL's journey. How many times is he going to use that Tarzan/Jane line? Oh, the bWo does exist for this video package. This video package explains Meanie didn't get a shot in on JBL till Batista won the match with a spinebuster. (1:26) Oh, this is part one.

Hype hype hype filler

And now the match from Thursday. (6:08)
GAB: Batista vs JBL [WORLD]
GAB: Orlando Jordan vs Chris Benoit [US]
GAB: Torrie vs Melina in a Bra & Panties Match
GAB: MNM vs Road Warrior Animal & Heidenreich [WWE TAG]
GAB: Booker T vs Christian
GAB: Undertaker vs Muhammad Hassan [WORLD #1]
GAB: Rey Mysterio vs Eddie Guerrero

Up next: Chris Benoit vs Eddie Guerrero

WWE Slam of the Week, presented by the Devils Rejects: Undertaker hates attorneys

William Regal (Blackpool, England, 245 pounds) vs Chris Benoit (Atlanta, GA, 234 pounds) - They've blocked out twenty minutes for this, including entrances. Josh: "the Undertaker might have gone too far, but what's done is done." Ha. Your ref is Brian, of course. GAB is free for troops, once again. They're not shaking hands. Lockup, no. Lockup, o advantage, crowd loud for Benoit.  Still battling on collar ad elbow. Josh mentions the Brian Pillman Memorial match. Benoit's finally taking control and backing Regal into the corner. Brain has to wedge in to force the break, but there's no cheap shot. Lockup, Regal with a headlock. Benoit turning it with a wristlock, Regal tries to reverse it, but Benoit immediately reveres to a wristlock. Regal with a forward roll to escape, snap mare for Benoit. Benoit escapes the chinlock, Regal takes him down with another snap mare, but, Benoit again escapes and get san armbar. Regal armdraging out, but Benoit holds on to the arm, into a hammerlock. Regal back up to his feet. Plug for Hassan on WWE.com. Regal around into a front facelock, but Benoit yanks him down by the left arm. Regal backs up and massages his arm, and we quickly go to the break. (1:59)

Regal has the better of Benoit in a test of strength as we return. Benoit bridges all the way back and Regal is bending him down. Benoit trying to power up, and Regal drops a knee on his midsection - but Benoit doesn't break the bridge! Benoit fighting back and all the way up now. Now it's Regal who's bent all the way over. Regal drops to his back, and scissors Benoit's head with his leg. Now boots to the head from the mat, but Benoit won't let go. Regal kips up, Regal headbutt, Benoit headbutt! That was awesome. That breaks one of the wristlocks, but Benoit grabs it back. Monkey flip, they both try for a bodyscissors, Benoit ends up on top and gives Regal mounted punches while Regal is in the guard (right?) Benoit is warned away, and we take a look at Regal's head - it's bleeding form that headbutt. Benoit with a knee to the head. Benoit seems to be sizing up a chop, but Regal ducks under. Benoit with a front facelock, kneelift, Regal escapes into a full nelson, Benoit blocks it form getting locked do and switches to his own. Regal blocking - Josh notes Regal lifts and grabs his own knee in trying to block the full nelson, which neither of us have ever seen before. Regal with a go behind, Benoit with a go behind and he's got the full nelson locked - DRAGON SUPLEX! Oh boy. Is Benoit bleeding, or is that Regal's blood? Regal's forehead is pretty bloody. Both slow up, Benoit rushes Regal into the corner. Chop devastates Regal. Knee to the midsection. Stomp. Benoit pulling up Regal by the hair, knocking him down. Knee to the forehead. Waistlock, Regal trying to free himself with back suplex, but Benoit's got it locked - German Suplex! Both down again. One two three four five six Benoit up first, but Regal runs him over with a knee lift. Forearm to the jaw cover one two no, one two no, one two no, one two no, one two no! Armbar by Regal. Now he's letting go - ah, he's going for the Regal Stretch. Got the leg lock hooked in (like with the last match, Romero wants to call everything that ties the leg a figure four - Josh interrupts to correct), but Regal is blocking the facelock. Regal uses crossface forearms to the head to weaken him, but Benoit gets to the ropes to break. Regal backs off, waits for Benoit to turn around, Benoit doesn't turn around so Regal kicks him in the upper back. Regal with a chickenwing and a forearm wrapped around Benoit's face. Benoit thrown down to the mat, and Regal ties up the legs. Hey, he's not - tapatia! Regal is seated and not on his back, and Benoit is hurting. Regal lets go of of the armbars, and pulls Benoit all the way back for a chinlock. Benoit in trouble - but back elbows out. Break. (5:47) Why, no, we don't often get three segment matches.

Regal lands a kneelift as we return. Benoit goes for a single leg takedown, but Regal steps over, and slips behind for an inside cradle one two no. Regal with a kick, double underhook, turning Benoit over for a backslide, got in one two NO. Benoit gets a double leg takedown, Shapshooter! Regal in a lot of trouble - he's not close to the ropes, but he's going to try and get to them. Regal crawling, crawling - ad Benoit pulls him back! Regal won't give up! Crawling once again. Benoit doesn't have a good hold of it - and Regal gets to the ropes. Both guys are out on the mat. One two three four five. Regal with a kick to the side, knee, knee, knee, Snap mare, kick to the chest. One two NO. Chinlock, pulling Benoit's chest forward into his chest. Elbow. Double underhook again by Regal, holding o while Benoit tries to trip Regal out of leverage. Benoit double arm suplex! And Regal's not letting go - he's still got the double underhook locked on. Back up to their feet, Regal with knee lifts. Butterfly suplex! Regal rolling over to cover, one two no, one two no, one two no, one two no, one two no! Regal with a standing dropkick. One two no. Regal picks up Benoit - for a Tombstone? Benoit reverses it, and now he's got Regal set up - big shoulder breaker. Josh sees this as the set up for the crossface. Benoit tired - but he's going for it. Regal blocking it - but Benoit's got it, and it's over immediately. (4:09, 11:55 total) Big ovation for this match. Josh:" A five star match by Rabid Wolverine Chris Benoit and the William Regal." If he can do THAT to William Regal, what's he going to do to Orlando?

That's it.