The RIDERS won? Oh man, I had all my money on the Slashers.

TV 14 dlv CC entertainment open - retooled again, though they're never taking out the crash into the Rock, with more Tajiri/Eddie stuff. They should seriously redo them whenever someone new wins a belt to focus on them or something. Fireworks happened back there while I was rambling.

Sean O'Haire (274 pounds) vs Ultimo Dragon (Nagoya, Japan, 185 pounds) - Your announcers are Josh and Substitute Math Teacher Bill. Nice haircut, better shirt. Bill ("Junior") sees how long he can talk here without saying anything at all or taking a breath. 15 seconds! You think Ultimo is just scouting for guys he'd like to bring for guest shots in Toryumon at this point? "Ultimo Dragon kicking things off, here with Sean O'Haire, it's gonna be a great Saturday Night, Bill! [quiet Cat-esque pause] Bill?" Bill's insulted by the joke Josh made and I added on to. Josh's fake laugh is really coming along. We go all of :02 before someone (Josh) says "contrasting styles". Bill partially disagrees, because they both kick a lot (though he says "Martial Arts".) Circle. Ultimo ducks under the lockup. Bill: "...Ultimate Dragon..." Man of Questions slipped up there. Circle, Ultimo ducks under and gets a waistlock, Headlock, shot off, back with a slightly jumping shoulderblock but Ultimo goes down. Giving up 89 pounds there, so that's probably not going to work. Just to be sure, Sean stands there so Ultimo can try again - off the ropes, jumping shoulderblock, Sean ain't going anywhere. O'Haire standing and waiting. Ultimo off the ropes, rolling under the big swinging side kick before it's even swung, Ultimo with a quick stop, O'Haire kick is caught, Dragon sweeps the leg, cover one big kickout. Ultimo retreats to the corner, O'Haire charges, Dragon moves out of the way, O'Haire goes in chest first. Dragon with the five kick combo - no, O'Haire shoves him away at two. Ultimo back up and charging, but O'Haire nails him with the kneeling clothesline. Bill: "That's a ridge hand. Every time we see Sean O'Haire throw that, I have to remind you." I missed that week, sorry! Josh asks the difference, Bill offers to show him after the show. Okay. Boot choke. Josh uses grounded in a bad pun/segue of epic proportions. More choking in the corner. Scoop, running toss slam. He got some distance on that. Spine kick. "There's your conflicting styles, Junior." Boot choke. Cover, one two no. Grinding his elbow into Ultimo's face - er, mask. Cover one two no. Kneeling surfboard! Wouldn't you want your brother to deliver your eulogy? I guess this is a special cause. Ultimo rallying out (of a strength hold? by O'Haire?) but Sean stops that with kicks to the back. Corner whip, Sean charges in, Ultimo nails him with the ax kick. Sean charges in again, and gets two boots. He's 0-3 for that now. Ultimo charges out, spinning headscissors, not as great as usual. As requested by management, Ultimo yells and acts pumped here to show more fire. (Because the entrance bit isn't enough! I'll be here all week.) Five Kick Combo works one two NO. Dragon screw leg whip, La Majistral uno dos NO! Ultimo grabs Sean in a facelock, but O'Haire escapes with a knee. Forearm to the back, powerbomb lift, Ultimo slides over and down for the sunset flip, O'Haire not going, Ultimo just laying there and hoping that a strong gust of wind will knock him over, O'Haire picks up Dragon by the neck, Dragon tossed up and dropkicking O'Haire on the way down! O'Haire to the outside, so Dragon baseball slides to keep him there. Slingshot to the apron, Asai Moonsault is sidestepped, Ultimo lands on his feet, but goes down in a heap grabbing his left knee immediately. Ultimo ain't moving much, and Sean seems a little surprised. He gives a look to Hebner, and throws Ultimo in as both Bill and Josh note the possible knee injury. O'Haire back in and wasting on time - Inverted DVD one two three (4:48) O'Haire's reaction after Ultimo went down - as if he was expecting Ultimo to be doing another spot - seemed to me to indicate that wasn't planned. If Josh or Bill had bothered to sell "that's why they call it High Risk!", I could've been swayed to believe it was angle. Time was nearly right.

Later: Kane sings us a song. A song about death. With no music.
Up Next: Brock, being a heel, made Nathan Jones and Chris Benoit wrestle.

SmackDown Live
11/25 - Boise, ID [SD!]
12/2 - San Jose, CA [SD!]
12/4 - Seoul, South Korea [Passport to SmackDown!]
12/5 - Singapore, Singapore [Passport to SmackDown!]
12/6 - Perth, Australia [Passport to SmackDown!]
[As the rule with foreign tours, dates are not explicitly mentioned, but you can catch 'em if you quick enough]

Josh and Bill explain what the deal with Brock being mad was, so all of his teammates had missions 

Matt Morgan had a pretty easy mission. We mention Shannon getting punished because of V1 - people getting punished often turn face, but then Shannon was letting Matt do that to him, so who knows. (:24)
A-Train vs Bradshaw (:38) I think we see more of the post match then the match
Brock and Jones. Has Holly taken a bump yet? Well he won't be doing it now (3:34) 
Bill: "Up next for Team Lesnar, Big Show vs John Cena." Josh: "Would they make it 3 for 3?" Um. (3:22)
DeMott's Turning Point - Big Show probably shouldn't have needed a the steps in the ring. And kicking the ref was a bad idea.(:58)
This went all 8:56 combined. 

Tonight: Scotty 2 Hotty vs Rhyno

Lugz hopefully makes a boot for broken ankles or Chavo's in need of some new shoes.

Nunzio (201 1/4 pounds, w/Johnny Stamboli) vs Paul London (Hartford, CT, 205 pounds, w/Spanky) - no sleep till someone finds Chuck. Nunzio's right knee is tapped. Oh, Chuck vs Funaki later tonight! Paul London does not have his own music or video yet. Spanky and London have matching outfits now, and Spanky has the really tiny pants. Josh notes the irony of them getting the same outfit, then having singles matches. Circle. Nunzio is very slightly limping. Lockup, no, Nunzio behind with wristlock, takedown, spin around on London's back, slaps to the back of the head, London reverses into a hammerlock, up to their feet, Nunzio reverses to his own hammerlock, London rolls into a wristlock, Nunzio reverses to his own, London rolls forward and scissors Nunzio's head, rolling into a cover one two no. Both up, Nunzio shoves London in frustration. London goes to shove back, but Nunzio sweeps the leg and covers zero. Nunzio yells at the crowd, and turns back to find London - offering a handshake? Nunzio can't believe this - he's not Hurricane! Nunzio puts his arm out, then pulls London in for a short clothesline, but London ducks under, Northern Lights Suplex one two NO. London planned that, you know. Forearms, whip, backdrop. One two NO. Corner whip, reversed, Nunzio runs into a back elbow. London going up - and Johnny sweeps him off into the ring! One two NO! Nunzio can't believe he didn't win by cheating. Spanky is arguing with the referee now about that, and Nunzio has words wit him too - Paul London inside cradle one two NO! Nunzio up and clotheslining London down. Lower my knee pad knee drop. Snap mare, chinlock. Crowd getting back into it with Spanky's help. Corner whip, London charges, Nunzio gets up a knee, Sicilian Slice one two NO! Nunzio threatens a first upside Spanky's head, then goes to do jumping jacks. Kick to London's chest. London tries to fight his way up with forearms, but an eye poke stops that. Corner whip, Nunzio charges it with a back elbow but London moves out of the way. Johnny's on the apron to check on his partner, London charges the corner, Nunzio dodges and Johnny takes a forearm off the apron. Spanky wants in, and that's only distracting the ref as London forearms Nunzio. Johnny trips up London from outside, and London's crotched on the post. Nunzio stomps him down in the corner. That's Aggravated Assault. Johnny plays innocent when Sparks is finally over to check. Snap mare, chops to both side of the neck. Johnny on the apron arguing again, as London reverses a slam to a small package, Sparks finally turns around one two no. Nunzio with a big sidewalk slam, one two no. Chinlock. Taking London all the way down to the mat. Spanky trying to root him on, London getting up, elbowing out, Nunzio forearms him down. Whip is broken, Nunzio kicks is blocked, jumping enziguri! Spanky yelling for London. Nunzio misses a right, misses a left, London with a not great 'rana. Dropsault one two NO. London tries picking Nunzio up, right misses, Nunzio grabs London for a Back suplex, London lands on his feet, double chicken wing - into a face first powerbomb? Wow. One two Johnny puts Nunzio's foot on the ropes. Sparks argues with Johnny, but London clears him out with a baseball slide dropkick. STANDING SHOOTING STAR PRESS one two NO! Corner whip, London charges at Nunzio, Nunzio backdrops him to the apron, Nunzio's forearm is blocked and London snaps his neck on the top rope. London climbing up but Johnny grabs a leg to keep him from moving. Spanky through the ring and knocking Johnny down with a slingshot somersault plancha! London slingshots to the second rope, springboard moonsault gets knees! Nunzio the second rope - dropkick square to the head one two three. (6:54) Nunzio won, but he sure doesn't look like it. Johnny has to help him his feet, and even then, Nunzio is falling down. Replays of parts of the match. Nunzio is happy with his hard earned 3.

Still to come: "A One Time Appearance by Kane." Says them.

T3 Was Nidia blind when she decided she didn't need her hair curly? They're gonna make me sad if she's really not blind. I couldn't bear to see that couple split.

SmackDown #1 Announcer Funaki (Japan, 208 pounds) vs Chuck Palumbo (280 pounds) - No sleep till clean sweep. Wait, they decide that Nunzio needs help against London, but Chuck needs no help against Funaki? Okay. Bill says Chuck is going to be in a lot more singles matches. Bill: "He's a heavyweight contender." Lockup, Funaki shoved down. Chuck is proud of himself. Lockup - wait, no, Chuck has a better idea. He'll go to his knees to make it even. Chuck points out how smart he is to the crowd, and gets a dropkick to the head. Right, right, Chuck stops that with a knee. Ramming Funaki into the corner, shoulder, backing off. Right is ducked out by Funaki, Funaki with a right that just annoys Chuck, Chuck puts on the chase, Funaki out, Chuck out, Funaki in, Chuck in, Funaki ducks the clothesline and hit a dropkick to the knee. Chuck still up, so Funaki dropkicks the knee again one two no. Funaki with rights, corner whip - no, blocked. Blocked again, and Chuck with a spinning  belly to belly suplex. Chuck grabs Funaki's leg and then clotheslines him down. Chuck pushes around Funaki on the mat, then stomps him down in the corner. Snap mare, off the ropes, big kick to the back. Cover one two No. Snap mare hold, taking Funaki down to one knee. Funaki trying to rally back, right, right, right, stomp on Chuck's foot! Right, corner whip, reversed and Funaki goes down one two NO. Bill started talking about how Chuck makes youthful mistakes like not hooking the leg, and just as he was getting to it, Chuck hooked the leg. Bill makes up for it by calling him "Sho Funaki". DISCUS PUNCH! Chuck is proud of himself, and now covering one two no. Elevated bear hug. Bill thinks Chuck has the best right hand in the business. Josh tells Bill that he's running for Mayor of (Josh: "My home town" - guess he's not Chicago anymore) Stratford, Connecticut. Josh: "Things are going to change in Stratford, CT, I can promise you that!" Funaki is biting his way out of this. Right, big clubbing shot from Chuck knocks him down. Chuck scoops Funaki up, running powerslam leads to the reversal twisting DDT by Funaki. Bill is not talking again. Both men down. Both up, Funaki with right hands, corner whip, reversed, Funaki moves and Chuck hits the post. Bulldog, one two no. Josh: "Pretty soon, you could call me Mayor Junior." Josh notes it's like Velocity announcers to turn into something bigger - lookat the Cat (back in Boise.) Someone is suffering from Tazz/Cat withdrawal. Well, not just one person. Funaki with more punches, whip, reversed, Funaki tries a backslide, Chuck stops it and hits another knee. Powerbomb - no, Funaki silos behind. Josh: "Maybe some day, you'll be Mayor, Bill." Bill: "Maybe some day, I'll be in Boise." Josh: "Maybe some day, you'll be the Cat." Off the ropes, Whacked. One two thre-HE KICKED OUT? What the - Chuck can't believe it! That's his move! Josh is officially on the edge of his seat - this replay of the superkick doesn't help. Bill: "Maybe some day I could be WHAT?" Funaki resting on the ropes, and Chuck decides to go after him. Chuck grabs one leg - and gets an enziguri from the other. TIIIIIIIIMBER. Funaki pulling himself slowly pulling himself to the turnbuckle and then up as Bill says "Sho" again and Josh takes it is a permission to say it as many times as he'd like. Bill: "Did you say some day I could be the Cat?!?!" Josh: "I don't think those words came out of my mouth, Bill!" Top rope cross body - is caught. Lift into a Samoan Drop, one two three. (5:46) I guess that's his finisher now? Josh loves calling FBI things "Italian [whatever]" instead of the normal name.

Up Next: Kane has a special pre Thanksgiving wish.

Kane TALKS. (3:40)

Boise, ID gives the Cat a Key to the City. The official Cat coin? This vignette goes weird and strange places I'm not prepared to go, wow. I think he's got an upgrade over Mr. Jones at any rate.

Scotty 2 Hotty (Westbrook, ME, 217 pounds, w/Rikishi) vs Rhyno (Detroit, MI, 245 pounds) - Josh is counting down the SECONDS till the Cat gets here. Oh no now I have to remember what Maine's abbreviation is. Such is the hard knock life. Josh got a memo saying that Bill is responsible for picking Cat at Boise State and to give him a tour, because "you're just like the Cat." Rikishi is here because he could really use the walk. Josh: "Hey Bill, what's wrong buddy, Cat got your tongue? HAHAHAHA" Bill wonders if Josh will be driving Michael Cole. Circle, although Scotty has to walk all wacky while doing it. Rhyno just stares at him, so Scotty does it in slow motion. If only that helped. CLAP CLAP CLAP. Rhyno has had enough of shenanigans and kicks Scotty in the midsection, forearm to the back to take him down. Rhyno mocks the clap! That's very serious, Rhyno. Right. Armbar, into a hammerlock and running Scotty shoulder first into the buckle. Running him over with a shoulderblock, one two NO. Bill: "That's like being hit by a bus!" Josh: "or a Rhyno" Bill wonders why every singles match tonight has someone in the corner. I MISS TAZZ. Right. Right. Back suplex, no, Scotty lands on his feet, kick, whip, reversed, Scotty grabs the ropes, Rhyno charges, Scotty throws him over. Meanwhile, Bill was talking about how he never had (and needed) anyone to back him up and I'm about to yell about the significance of the Leprechaun when Josh interjects to trump me: "You had the Misfits, Bill, you were the Misfits! MIA! Bill DeMott!" Bill: "..." Scotty busts a move, then does the baseball slide dropkick. Someone desperately needs to find a new move for that situation. Rhyno thrown into the apron and then in. Rhyno tries to catch Scotty on the apron but gets a knee, Scotty slingshots back in over him. Right, right, corner whip (hard enough for Scotty to knock himself down), Scotty charges and Rhyno throws him past into the post. Confidently next. Bill says both people are coming back from a neck injury, but while Scotty just wants to dance for the crowd, Rhyno has a purpose (evidently to set the record for most consecutive Velocity appearances.) Rhyno with a single arm DDT one two NO. Step over armbar. He's working on the left shoulder. Rikishi is - staring intensely at his partner. Bill: "This hold here could make Scotty tap out." Rhyno, perhaps somehow not believing the same, lets go to sit down on the shoulder. RHYNO MOCKS THE WORM DANCE! Kick to Scotty's head. Rikishi is - yelling for Scotty to comeback, that's something. Choke on the middle rope. Armwhip takedown, sure. Josh says "Dude", which endears him to me but not Bill. Bill: "Did you just call me 'dude'?" Josh: "Yea." Boot on the neck. Bill (again): "Did you just call me 'dude'?" Josh: "I called yea, I did it! I called you dude. You call me junior." Bill: "Stop it." Josh: "Okay." This is more riveting then the armbar now on. Rhyno asks for the crowd to shut up. They do not. Scotty rallying back, right, right, right, right but Rhyno kicked him. Corner whip, Rhyno charges into a back elbow. Scotty charges out, spinning headscissors. Scotty kips up and wins the punch battle. Whip, reversed, leaping clothesline. Whip, reversed, Scotty ducks the clothesline and hits the superkick. One two NO. Scotty can't believe it. Taking his time. Looking at Rikishi, then realizes where Rhyno is. Off the ropes, and Rhyno nails him before Scotty can hit the two handed bulldog. Now it's Rhyno's turn to look at Rhyno, waiting in the corner for the Gore. Rikishi pounding the mat to warn Scotty, which draws the ire of Rhyno. Rhyno lands out of the ring and slaps Rikishi in the face. Rikishi thinks, remembers there has to be a reason why he's out here to begin with, and then punches. Rhyno reels back into the ring - kick wham DDT! Right in position.  W O R M woo woo woo who who ya one two THREE. (5:05) You can beat the power of the Worm. Rikishi wants to raise up Scotty's arm - but he's raising the hurt arm. Scotty switches positions and now it's all good. 

Confidential is next.