tv 14 dlv CC entertainment 

No Mercy Video Package, blah blah blah blah (1:09)

open. Josh: "SmackDown as we know it has changed." I dunno, it still ended with Vince.

Shannon Moore (Raleigh, NC, 209 pounds) vs Orlando Jordan (Miami, FL, 240 pounds) - Your announcers are Josh and Tazz Rue Michael Cole! Add that to the list of things I was wrong about. As it was the last time he was on this show, Cole is in the role the mildly sarcastic color guy. Cole beats Josh to the MFer joke. Matt's not here because he's ticked about losing to Zach, we're figuring. Josh says that Orlando and Shannon have met before on this show, but does not add "because they're on it pretty much every week." Lockup. Shannon forced into the ropes, clean break? No, Shannon slaps Orlando. Shannon: "DO YOU WANT SOME OF THIS?" Orlando charges - into a kick. Shannon off the ropes, and into a back elbow. Cole, when doing the Orlando Jordan background recitation, notes that Orlando wrestled at Boise State, where they'll be having a show soon. Hiptoss by Orlando, jab jab Shannon stops that with an eye poke. Shanno0n right, kick, whip, reversed into a short drop toe hold onto the middle rope from Shannon. Shannon to the apron, big boot to Orlando's face! "WHAT?" Back in and cover one two no. Stomping Orlando to prevent him from getting up, then picking him up anyway to choke on the far ropes. Shannon with the running hipcheck into the back one two no. Shannon with a corner whip, and Orlando goes down. Chinlock. Cole: "Heyman is back, and all I can say is 'yeeech.'" Orlando elbowing up, so Shannon forearms him down. Kick to the ribs. Kicking Orlando in the chest as he gets up, suplex, one two no. Cole says that working with Tazz on Velocity has made Josh miserable. Josh says he was miserable on Velocity far before Tazz showed up. (Well, yea, Cat.) Shannon back suplex. "WHAT?" Dude, not your catchphrase. Going to the second rope - is he thinking Downfall Raindrop? "YOU!" FLYING ABSOLUTE NOTHING - his chin to Orlando's boot. I HATE THAT SPOT. HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT. There's absolutely NOTHING that Shannon could rationally be doing except trying to get hit by Orlando's boot. Orlando's on the mat, so no (lame and usually pathetically for show only) axhandle, Shannon would have to have exception depth perception problems to miss a big stomp on Orlando because he didn't move - there's absolutely nothing he could be doing there. If you don't want to do a missed actual move from the turnbuckles, then just do some other transition - I'd much rather see a million missed clothesline than a clearly indefensible moronic attempt at offense. By the same token, I'm sure you also hate how I have to go on this rant every time they do it. But Shannon's far better than that. Shannon doesn't even come close to hitting the boot and the fans boo- a creative camera angle can not disguise it. Orlando inside cradle one two no. Shannon gets the knee in, and takes a moment to adjust his pants. Whip, clothesline ducked (hey, we're doing it anyway!), and Orlando hits the five arm. Whip, backdrop. Jab jab shuffle right one two NO. Corner whip, Orlando charges in to two boots, Shannon off with his second rope leg lariat! One two NO! Shantrum. Cole goes "that's Josh" while Josh goes "Tazz said that's Cole." Cole says Tazz would never say such a thing, and Josh takes it to mean that Cole hasn't been watching the show. Corner whip, reversed, Shannon tires to kip and up out, Orlando catches him on the shoulder, Orlando drops him into suplex position and takes him over with a swinging neckbreaker one two three? (3:44) No Black Ice? It's eh. 

Later: Rey Mysterio, Billy Kidman and Ultimo Dragon vs the FBI! Wow, it's the Legion of Extraordinary Cruiserweights.

Up Next: Could Eddie (and Chavo) hold on to the tag team titles?

SmackDown Live!
10/26 - Albany, GA
10/27 - Augusta, GA
10/28 - Atlanta, GA [SD!]
11/01 - Kitchener, ON
11/02 - Montreal, QC

SmackDown! Here Comes the Worm! and Stinkface.

Eddie tries to turn his luck around on SmackDown! (3:17)

Later: Rey Mysterio, Billy Kidman and Ultimo Dragon vs the FBI

Y2J Buzzsaw Kick. Wow, they can perform a double legsweep on a legged man! That's talent

Paul London & Spanky (393 pounds) vs Mike Taylor & Rob Bakley (448 pounds, already outside the ring) - Spanky's music, and they both do the un into the ring. Spanky and I find out later Rob start out. Lockup, Spanky with a back heel trip, headlock back to his feet, Rob gets a hammerlock, Spanky forward rolls out of it, wristlock, Rob with a forearm, headlock of his own, down to a one knee. Up to his feet, Spanky shoots him off, Rob back with a shoulderblock. Rob off the ropes, over - no, Spanky with an ankle trip. 

Josh: "Obviously, Mr. McMahon was toying with London-" 
Cole: "Just like Mr. McMahon was toying with me, putting me in this spot with you." 
Josh: "Mr. McMahon doesn't even know your name!" 
Cole: "If he doesn't know my name, then he hasn't seen you!"

Spanky with a front facelock, back to his corner, London makes the blind tag and slingshots into a sunset flip on Rob one two no. London with an armbar, but rob stops him with a knee lift. Rob with an armbar, tag to Mike, twist. Mike with a back suplex, London lands on his feet and shoves Mike into Rob. Kick for Rob, corner whip, charge in, Spanky with the blind tag as Paul uses a monkey flip, Spanky (Josh: "Sir Spanky Spanksalot!") top rope cross body one two NO. Cole says London and Spanky sent Tazz and Cole drinks and popcorn during No Mercy. Whip, reversed, Rob tries the trip from outside but Spanky hops over it, Spanky with a sliding dropkick for him, out to the apron, shoulder, slingshot over Mike back in, charge, Mike with a flapjack and Rob drives Spanky's neck over the top rope! Nice. Rob and Mike make a illegal switch, and chokes Spanky. Stomp. Turnbuckle smash. Corner choke. Bakley was in the Marines for four years. Tag to Taylor. Elbow smash to the back of the neck, one two no. Choke. Kneeling surfboard. Spanky elbows out, off the ropes, into a Rob kneelift. Tag to Mike, and kicks to the back. Stomps. Spanky tries to kick at him from the mat, but Mike stomps him and punches London off the apron. Neck vice, and switch to Rob to take over. Spanky standing up from it after a moment, and armdrag out. Spanky ducks a clothesline, tag to London! Duck the clothesline, forearm for Mike, back elbow for Rob, back elbow for Mike, clothesline for Rob, backdrop for Mike, block and forearms for Rob. Whip, flipping dropkick for Rob. Josh says it's the "Dropsault". One two no. I think I've gotten these two guys confused at some point -they're both average sized guys with blond dyed hair and black tights, though they're different enough that I should be able to tell. Double suplex on London, but London slips out (I think Spanky was supposed to be there to help him land and got there late), Spanky superkick for Taylor, London ducks a clothesline and superkicks Rob! Josh drops the "both trained by HBK!" Spanky with a somersault plancha on Taylor (Josh's move name gets drowned out by the crowd) and London with through the ropes plancha on the back of Rob. Josh says the dive name again - "the Whirling Twirltizer!" Cole and Josh discuss Spanky's choices in move names. Taylor brought in, and our heroes hit a reverse STO/jumping enziguri combo. London covers one two three. (5:00) The combo move or the enziguri only could've been "the Exclamation Point!" or maybe Josh didn't mean that as a move name. Hard to say. 

Stu Hart, In Loving Memory, (:48)

StipulationMania from Thursday. Foreshadowing of Paul Heyman's tenure as GM: In the end, on his first night, Undertaker got the better of him no matter what Heyman did, and he was a background figure in Vince vs Undertaker. I'm thinking he'll have as much impact in this role as he did with the Alliance (commentating ignored.) Why do they always end the stipulations at No DQ, No Countout, Two Out Of Three Falls and Falls Count Anywhere? Where's the creativity? I'd totally make it "[evil team] can win via one counts!" or something. (11:26) Wow that was forever and a day

Survivor Series: Undertaker vs Mr. McMahon in a Buried Alive Match. 
Survivor Series: Build a Bridge by Limp Bizkit, official theme song

Next: Rey Mysterio, Billy Kidman and Ultimo Dragon vs the FBI

Backstage, the APA are wandering around, but notice their office has been invaded - by Paul London and Spanky. Looks like they got into the food, the cigars, and the beer. Spanky especially the last part -he's toasted. Paul tries to explain - they won their first match as a tag team, they want to celebrate, and they know the APA can party. And that the APA already has the beer. Spanky: "Have a beer, they're yours!" Bradshaw says it's their food and they're food while throwing at Spanky. Bradshaw notes there's no money, so London and Spanky will have to be killed to pay for it. Spanky and London try to explain their way out of it. Bradshaw: "You know what you have - a malignant case of wall to wall dumbass! You're stupid! Moron! Idiot! But you got cajones! [London notes that's a good thing] And I like that. You want to make it here? ["PLEASE"] You bust your ass, that's how you make it here." Faarooq says Guess What, and adds another stipulation - they gotta get their drink on. Spanky says it's not a problem and does his Austin impersonation (much going down his chest) before collapsing out of his chest. Bradshaw: "You know, I think he's going to make it." Bradshaw and Faarooq say it goes for London too, but London doesn't drink, then quickly reassess and decides he does now and chugs one. APA seem to - approve? Did Bradshaw just now know Spanky was working for the company? That's catching.

Rey Mysterio (San Diego, CA, 175 pounds), Billy Kidman (Allentown, PA, 215 pounds) and Ultimo Dragon (Nagoya, Japan, 185 pounds) vs the FBI (730 pounds) - Rey's wearing his Dr. Wagner outfit. Watch Bottom Line/Afterburn to win a WWE Party. This leads to a discussion about which host is the draw on Afterburn. Josh: "I've been doing that show for years, and all of the sudden, here comes Rue and now everyone's watching Afterburn." Speaking of trouble with time, Cole says "the FBI's been together for a couple years." FBI get new music? Retooled. Seems like a new open. Wow, we have tons of time left here. Ultimo and Nunzio will start, circle, Ultimo makes a move towards Nunzio and Nunzio hides in the ropes. Circle. Lockup, break. Nunzio is lacking in confidence here, but his partners are telling him to take it to Ultimo. Lockup, no, Nunzio knee, forearm in the back, whip, clothesline rolled under, Nunzio boot is caught, he swings with both hands but Ultimo is too far away, flip off gets the spinning heel trip one two NO. Double chop, kick, tag to Kidman. Double whip, double back elbow, Kidman covers one two no. Nunzio manages an eye gouge and tag in Johnny, who runs right into an armdrag. Forearm. Corner whip, reversed, Kidman kips up and headscissors Johnny down, clothesline one two no. Whip, reversed, Kidman goes low and shoulderblocks Nunzio off the apron. Johnny misses a clothesline, Kidman forearm, whip, reversed, and Chuck pulls him down by the hair. Chuck asks the crowd what they're complaining about as Johnny stomps. Tag to Chuck. Chuck runs Kidman into the corner back first. Shoulder, shoulder, shoulder, right, right, stomping a mudhole in him. Korderas warns Chuck to let him out of the corner and they have a discussion. Cole: "You and Tazz have been reading your thesauruses together, haven't you?" Josh: "I don't have a thesaurus - I haven't been sick in weeks!" OKAY. Snap mare, off the ropes, running spine kick. One two NO. Chinlock. Ultimo and Rey pounding the turnbuckle to rally Kidman. Chuck's switched to a leaning neck vice, and Kidman's battling up - only to get forearmed (not even close - camera shows it.) Chuck off the ropes, Kidman with a dropkick. Can he crawl to make a tag? Well, it'll help if he doesn't reach towards the FBI corner. Now he's got it - charging, jumping, but caught by Chuck. Scoop into a fireman's carry into a Samoan Drop, one two Ultimo breaks it up. Korderas attempts to explain the tag rules to Ultimo, but Chuck speeds things up by bum rushing Ultimo out of the ring. Now Rey wants in, but Korderas keeps him out. Chuck back to work - corner whip, Chuck charge into a boot. Kidman charge out, tossed up and coming down with a 'rana! Can he make the tag now? Tag to Nunzio, tag to Rey for the first time! Rey ducks a clothesline, Rey with a forearm, forearm, forearm, Cole is breaking out "Rey Rey" again, whip, reversed, Rey with a springboard cross body one two NO. Big flapjack, shot for Johnny on the apron (Chuck's still down), sliding dropkick to Nunzio's face, Johnny stops the run with a knee to the midsection. Johnny with a whip, Rey grabs the ropes, Johnny charges, Rey drops down and takes the top rope with him, Johnny flies out. Rey out to the apron as Chuck charges into a a shoulder. Rey with a right, springboard Thesz Press! Nunzio is back up and kicking, which actually works. Charging again does not - drop toe hold onto the middle rope. Rey runs for the 619, but Johnny trips his partner up off the ropes to take him off the ropes, and Chuck runs over Rey with a kneelift to knock him outside. 4 people out is good enough for a break? Well, one out of nowhere. (4:29)

Back, and Nunzio is whipping Rey into the corner chest first. Johnny with a stomp down in the corner. Ah, it's time for the rotating kickdown in the corner. Nunzio's turn. Then Chuck's turn. Josh says this is called "Aggravated Assault." Cole: "Me and the FBI are boys. We hang out." Chuck with a whip, tag to Johnny, Johnny with the sliding trip, Johnny with a big boot to the back, leaving Rey hanging on the bottom rope by his neck. While Johnny does a camel clutch around the middle rope, Josh realizes that Italy and Mexico use a lot of the same colors in their flags. Johnny with a stomp to the back. Tag to Nunzio, stomping, jumping jacks. Kick to the back. Snap mare, chinlock. Rey turning it around and trying to punch up, but Nunzio gets the better of it. Whip, quick reverse to a bodyscissors bulldog! Rey wants to make the tag, but Johnny distracts so Chuck can sneak in with an elbow drop. Nunzio makes the non-tag clap. Corner whip, and Rey goes down. Crotched on the post! Johnny and Nunzio pull the legs while Chuck stomps! Korderas is too busy yelling at Ultimo to do anything about it. Nunzio goes to the apron and makes one of those totally pointless clap tags (Chuck is standing inches away) and comes in to stop Rey for getting away. Camel clutch, and a big sit on the back. Tag to Ultimo, holding Rey for a kick. Johnny with an elevated bearhug. Cole says Johnny may be - pound for pound - be the strongest man in the WWE today. Which means he doesn't know Mark Henry is back on RAW. Johnny runs Rey in the corner. Corner whip, charge, and Rye gets a back elbow up. Charge again, and a boot. Rey charges out, bodyscissors release cradle to roll Johnny in the corner. Can Rey make the tag? They're bouncing on the bottom ropes hoping for one. Crawling crawling tag to Nunzio, tag to Ultimo! Ultimo with a clothesline, whip, reversed, backdrop but Ultimo lands on his feet, Ultimo Five Kick Combo! Chuck with a clubbing clothesline, whip, toss and Ultimo comes down with a dropkick. Johnny in, Johnny takes a spinning headscissors. Nunzio misses a  back elbow, Ultimo the ropes, QUEBRADA! One two NO! Hard kick to Nunzio back, double chop, whip, reversed, Nunzio grabs Korderas to distract him, Chuck and Johnny grab Ultimo for the double hiptoss pump powerbomb! Nunzio jacknife cover one two Kidman broke it up just as Ultimo was kicking up. Johnny grabs Kidman for Chuck to hit, but Kidman ducks the running punch and Johnny gets smacked. Rey back in - springboard dropkick for Palumbo, and he falls into the corner, right in position. Kidman calls for it- sliding dropkick to the going, Bronco Buster! Now what? Rey with a pescado onto Johnny, but Johnny catches him and posts him! Kidman charges Chuck in the corner, and takes a backdrop to the floor. Nunzio with a forearm for Ultimo, slam, no Ultimo slips behind, Nunzio shoved into the corner chest first, comes back to take the spinning heel kick to the midsection, Asai DDT is pushed off (too close to the corner for him to actually do it anyway) right into the Urban Jungle Kick! That'll do it, Nunzio covers one two three. (10:20) That was GOOD. Those too busy worrying about the finishes (which was more a "even low pushed Heavyweights are better than top Cruiserweights" thing than anything about Ultimo as it came off) missed a good match.

Paul Heyman! What will he do? Thursday!