You know what I had forget, before doing WM3rdDegree, is that shows like that where they just talk but say nothing take NO TIME to recap. I would've done it sooner if I remembered that.
I'd like to extend a special hello to the Man in the Iron Mask. You know, I actually watched the Leonadro DiCaprio version of that movie. Willingly. So you know this can't be worse.
TV 14 DLV entertainment CC open - I'll do these next week, I swear (by then maybe they'll take out Edge, and Rock, and Crash and) - fireworks. We are 24 hours away from a match 20 years in the making, and now it's street fight.
Jamie Noble (Hanover, WV, 200 pounds, w/Nidia, 7) vs SmackDown #1 Announcer Funaki (208 pounds, 9) - Chimel's lazy this week. Funaki really hasn't been doing much announcing lately. Circle. Lockup, Noble with headlock, Funaki breaks free, but Noble turns it into a hammerlock, reversed, Jamie with a hipblock takeover, armbar, headscissors reversal, break and standoff. Lockup, Nobel with waistlock, switch, Noble with an elbow. Forearm to the head, whip, reversed, Funaki with a hiptoss. Drop toehold (shut up Josh), dropkick to the face, one two no. Turnbuckle smash by Funaki, corner whip, no quick reverse into Noble's floatover swinging neckbreaker. Stomping. Turnbuckle smash. Corner shoulders. Short clothesline one two no. "I'm pumped up! Especially when I look at Nidia." Back suplex is blocked, but Noble works over the back - there's the back suplex (or a variant there off) one two NO. Chinlock. Nathan Jones making his in-ring debut at WrestleMania! We mean it this time! Funaki battling up, punches but thrown down by his hair. Cat wonders if Nathan violated his probation by beating down Palumbo. Single leg crab, but Noble not totally turning it over, working in a foot into Funaki's neck at one point. Funaki turns and kicks away Jamie. Jamie up and going for a single leg, but Funaki blocks, pin over him, backslide one two NO. Jamie up and hits a hard knee lift. Whip, quick reversal, foot catch enziguri! Josh and Cat remember how close Noble was to go to WrestleMania. Noble misses a right, Funaki with right, chop, right, chop, right, corner whip, running corner forearm. Off the ropes but right into the low angle powerslam one two NO. Noble is up but staggered - Tiger Bomb? NO, backdrop and a slingshot into the corner. Bulldog! Cover him one two no! Funaki picks up Jamie - suplex no Jamie lands behind, waistlock reverse rollup with a jacknife cover - Noble leans his arms out of the ring so Nidia can pull down for even MORE leverage one two Korderas catches it and kicks it apart. Noble argues inside cradle one two NO! Kick to the midsection, corner whip, reversed, Nobel charges into a back elbow. Jamie staggered, Rising Sun no Jamie breaks loose and chops. Slapping and chopping, but Jamie taunts and Funaki sneaks in one of his own - jumping Rising Sun! One two THREE! (4:53) Nidia can't believe it and neither can I! Upset win for Funaki, and let's watch the "jumping swinging DDT" (good call Josh) one more time because it was sweeeeet. Oh, your announcers are Cat and Josh, CALL YOUR MAMA.
Still to come, Hogan and Vince got EVEN BIGGER. Perhaps by involving actual wrestlers?
Next, Brock and Angle can't wait till WM.
SmackDown Live
03/30 - Seattle, WA [WM]
04/01 - Spokane, WA [SD!]
04/08 - Chicago, IL [SD!]
Stacy reads her lines as well as she usually does.
Lugz Angle attack on Lesnar of Two Weeks Ago
Brock/Angle - how we got here (3:00) Here's the graphic.
Rowdy Roddy Piper is a jilter lover himself, isn't he?
These Stacy bumpers add even less than I thought! She got her nails done last time, and now she's drinking champagne.
Gene Okerland sucks up
Playboy Press Conference (:58) Cat and Josh are upset they were assigned to that press conference.
Bill DeMott (280 pounds) vs Apollo Khan (220 pounds, already in the ring) - HMMMMMMMMMMMMM (hahahaha). Anyway, Josh says the over/under is 3 minutes and I'm sure as heck taking the under. If there was an angle going on here with Bill and Josh and/or Cat, they've stopped mentioning it. Lockup, Bill with a fierce back heel trop and forcing him donw with an armbar. Lots of yelling. Actually that's more a wristlock but I didn't see it. Wristlock using the middle rope. Choke on the middle rope with some forearms to the chest to force it in. Stomping. Corner open hand slap. Another. He's yelling "TELL HIM YOU QUIT" as we hit one minute. "Let his afro go!" Corner whip, DeMott charges into a boot and gives it a stunned sell. Right, right, Corner whip, reversed, announcers ludicrously building up Apollo chances suddenly, jumping to the second rope and supposed to jump back off for a second rope nothing of some kind but gets absolutely no distance, so it's just a normal clothesline that Bill decks him with. Apolo ain't moving and the ref wants to keep his distance, but Bill ain't having it. Whip, Bill's head is down too soon and all the sudden Apollo recovers and kicks him in the head. Off the ropes and Bill tries to decapitate him with a clothesline. Again the referee wants Bill to keep his distance so we can check if Apollo's still with us - Bill doesn't, but the ref signals to the back and calls for the bell. (1:55 - under wins!) Bill, of course, doesn't care. He wants to pull up Apollo and is stopped once, but lowers his traps and goes for it again. He's warned as the referees hit the ring. Replay of the KO clothesline. Trainer's out, but Bill isn't done - Apollo grabbed - yep, there's the powerbomb, Apollo looking very much like dead weight the whole way. They're asking him to leave now and it looks like he might just do it this time
Up next, Hogan and Vince.
Shane and Vince at Trax. I don't know if he's Tough Enough. I mean, what does beating Zip really prove? (1:09)
Street Fight at WM. This went by fast, but only because I was pushing a button to make that happen. (10:07)
More training with Shane. I bet they didn't play the circle game. I spent the whole time trying to figure out who that was in the background with Shane. It almost looks like Hardcore Holly in some shots but that couldn't be right. (:58)
Fred Durst will be at WM. Heck, let's run down everything right now so we can end with a match.
Jesse Ventura doesn't watch many PPVs
I like how the caption is "Stacy Kiebler: Diva".
WrestleMania Moment: LT vs Bam Bam Bigelow
Johnny Stamboli (Brooklyn, 250 pounds, w/Nunzio) vs Tajiri (Japan, 206 pounds) - no Chuck. Josh: "You know Cat, Italians don't like Jehovah's Witnesses, because they don't like ANY witnesses, hahaha." That's something. You know, last week, an FBI member beat Tajiri in a good match. I'm thinking that can't be more than half right this week. They size each other up. Lockup. Johnny throw Tajiri down, Tajiri goes out, Nunzio makes a move towards him, Tajiri throws a wild high kick, Nunzio ducks out of the way, Johnny out but Tajiri back in. Johnny slides in and gets slapped in his face, which pleases him none. Johnny now up to the apron, so Tajiri handsprings into him to take him back down. Pescado on to both FBI members! Johnny thrown in, Tajiri sliding right in and staring Johnny in the face. Hard kick to the leg, corner kick to the midsection, corner whip, reversed, Tajiri kip up but he's caught, he slides back under, Johnny charges, Tajiri kips up, Tarantula! Of course, he picked Nunzio's side of the ring for that to happen, so there's the leather coat punch. Johnny gets free adn stomps down Tajiri in the corner. Tajiri pulled out of the corner hard, one two NO. Choke on the mat, distraction so Nunzio can choke him out. Cat is unhappy about Tajiri so obviously going after Nunzio. Tajiri rallying back with strikes, whip, quick reverse, over head belly to belly suplex. One two no. Cat wants Johnny to hurry up and get done so he can go party. Chinlock. Josh hypes up Axxess, and Cat notes that they could even do play by play with Josh "and see how miserable I am!" Josh is hurt. Cat: "It's okay, I still love you." Foot catch enziguri. What sounds better, kick catch enziguri or foot catch enziguri? Or should I just learn how to spell enziguri properly? Johnny misses a clothesline, Tajiri with two hard kicks to the side, whip, reversed, Johnny tilt-a-whirl slam. Johnny to the top rope, top rope twist legdrop misses with Tajiri rolling far far out of the way. Did Josh have a name for that? I'm not sure - Tajiri with a nice dropkick to the head one two NO. Chop. Chop. Cat rooting for Johnny to end this. Off the ropes, clothesline ducks, wheel kick hits. Tajiri up again - sunset set flip, Johnny goes to sit down and punch but he's confused (both storyline and otherwise) by Tajiri bridging up and out - kick ot the back of the head one two NO! Tajiri with a hard kick to the back, whip, reversed, handspring elbow hits! Can he cover? No. Josh is rooting for Vanilla Ice to be Cena's challenge. Cat says he's bringing a couple of his friends, whatever that may mean. Josh hopes for 50 Cent, or Snoop. Tajiri with a waistlock but Johnny's got the ropes - Johnny punches back, then turns to a kick to the midsection. Setting up for the Buzzsaw Kick, Nunzio sees it and gets to the apron, so Tajiri give it to him instead. "You kicked the wrong guy! You kicked the wrong guy!" ForgetAboutIt, (Cat: "I forget about it!") uno due tre (4:43) Okay this wasn't SO bad. Johnny picks up his partner to carry him to the back.
WrestleMania is tomorrow - but Confidential is NEXT.