TV 14 DLV CC entertainment fireworks

Bill DeMott (280 pounds) vs Funaki (Japan, 208 pounds) - Bill's down to just wrist tape now and that bad arm, which must be a good sign. Your announcers are the Cat and Josh and they want to talk about Billy Kidman actually defending his title, wow. Cat likes Nidia this week, for those keeping score at home. Do they remember they have issues? Josh talks about DeMott picking on Brian Kendrick. Cat: "This guy don't like anyone from that Tough Enough series." Josh notes that Brian was not on Tough Enough. Lockup, no Funaki ducks under but right hands no effect. Funaki thrown in the corner and DeMott works him over. I'd describe more but the smoke from the fireworks is overpowering. Also, it's not too interesting. Corner whip, Funaki side steps the charge and hits the inside cradle one two no. Catch my foot enziguri. Rights have no effect, whip is blocked then reversed into a body check clothesline. Cat wants to see Brock vs Kurt take place! Right here on Velocity! Josh, oddly, has doubts about that happening on this show. Choke on the middle rope. Working him over on the middle rope. One two no. If this was, say, Chinese, and there was a character that'd express me looking at the timer and figuring out if four minutes was up yet, I'd put it right here. CHINlock. Cat wonders if Nathan Jones is on probation, which leads to Josh wondering how Cat knows so much about probation and Cat shushing him. Elbowing out but pushed down. Cat's been working with Funaki on his rapping skills - he's got to go to the 'hood. Jawbreaker, off the ropes, bulldog one two no. Bill misses a punch and gets a back heel kick. Whip, reversed, Bill puts his head down and gets it kicked. Funaki off the ropes again and into the clothesline. This is where Bill doesn't do the moonsault any more. DeMott doesn't even bother with a powerbomb, shoving Funaki down as he gets up and covering one two three? (3:08) Funaki's apparently out, though I don't know why that would stop a man like DeMott normally. Bill does look as his arm as if to see if he has a steel plate in it - we see two angles of the clothesline. Someplace in Texas, Bradshaw is throwing a bottle at the TV set. Not that he's watching this, no.

Later: Jamie Noble vs Billy Kidman for the Cruiserweight Title!

Up next, Cena vs Brock.

SmackDown! Live
Sunday - Detroit, MI
Monday - Cincinnati, OH
Tuesday - Indianapolis, OH [SD!]
Next Sunday - Montréal, QC

SLAMBALL TRYOUTS? In Chicago? Why didn't someone tell me - hmm, I have plans on the 19th and on the 20th, I'm probably not that bored.

Just so Cat knows, this is actually clips from SmackDown and not on Velocity. Holy crap, this is a long video package. (15:58) That MAY be a record. This is a lot easier to recap when I fast forward 1/4th of the show. Short segments to come.

"This Week" (Indianapolis), Brock Lesnar vs Kurt Angle - I guess they count on you not being smart enough to remember that Indy's on a Tuesday from the last break.

No Way Out: 6 Man Tag Team Match: Edge/Lesnar/Benoit vs Team Angle

Starburst 619 of Last Thursday

Shannon Moore (Raleigh, NC, 195 pounds) vs Mike Knox (Phoenix, AZ, 260 pounds, already in the ring) - Call me crazy, but I think Shannon might actually win this one. Josh, in hyping Matt vs Kidman, is nice enough to toss in a "if Jamie Noble doesn't win the title tonight" line. Circle. Lockup. Shannon with a waistlock, forearms to the back, forearms to the head. Headlock, shot in the ropes, back with a shoulderblock but the man with "Outlaw" on his tights isn't going down. Shannon is aghast. Off the ropes, ducks a clothesline, hits a jumping forearm. Dropkick. Off the ropes, tosses up but pulls of a 'rana. Kicks in the corner. Forearms. Corner whip, no reversed and Shannon goes into the same corner. Back suplex by Knox. Stomp one two no. Shannon fighting gout of the corner but gets a knee to stop that. Forearm to the back. Whip, side backbreaker. One two no. Forearm to the back. Shannon fighting back with forearms but is cut off with a knee again. Shannon's younger than ME? Don't tell me those things, Cat. Pushed chest first into the ropes and back into a forearm. Again. Surfboard. Knox got the memo about working a body part, apparently. The crowd has no idea who to root for here, but Shannon is trying to draw for the babyface comeback. Shannon standing up - kick, forearm but Knox stops him again with a knee. Corner whip, spin (I miss Crash too), charge into a back elbow. Shannon charges out under a clothesline, jumping leg lariat. Knox is stunned in the corner, comes otu with a clothesline, Shannon ducks, off the ropes and a jumping forearm. Dropkick to the knee. Wheel kick. Cat: "You know, Shannon Moore hasn't gotten a big win on TV in a long time." I know what thread he was reading! Corner whip, reversed, WOW crossbody one two no. Shannon is frustrated. Corner whip, reversed, spin, Knox meets double boot. Shannon to the second rope - hmm, his ex-pal called that the Overcast, but Josh wants to go with "twisting neckbreaker off the second rope" which is a lot more words. One two three! (3:20) SHANNON MOORE WINS! CALL A FRIEND! I think we tracked it down to being the first TV win since September 28th (Doug Bashman) but I might have missed one.

Up next, Hogan and Rock.

Stacker 2 Rock asks for a reminder of Two Weeks Ago

"You know kid, I really enjoyed the Hogan movies - and I really enjoyed the Rock movies too!" - Anyway, let's go back to a year ago to see how this happened this first time. (5:47)

"This Week" (Indianapolis) - Hogan and Rock will be in the building! Maybe they can actually film matchup videos then.

Up next: Jamie Noble vs Billy Kidman vs Cat's bad card read of the week.

Jamie Noble (Hanover, WV, 200 pounds, w/Nidia, 6) vs Thug Life Billy Kidman (Allentown, PA, 215 pounds, 1, c) for the WWE Cruiserweight Title (5th Defense) - Josh, while discussing the announcement of a SmackDown woman in Playboy, floats the idea that it could be Stephanie. "It could even be you, kid!" Lockup, Noble with a single leg, kicked away. Noble with a "step over toe hold" (don't do that), spinning into a front facelock. Back up to their feet. Josh notes that this is Noble's first rematch since losing the Cruiserweight title to Kidman. Noble escapes out into an armbar. Into a hammerlock. Kidman looks for a way out, reverse to one of his own. Noble with a back elbow, forearm to the head. Whip, clothesline misses, Kidman with a spinning back elbow. Corner whip, reversed, Kidman kips up and there's a headscissors to take Noble to the floor. Kidman is pumped - is he gonna dive? Pescado - and Nidia valiantly saves her man, shoving them both out of harms way! Kidman goes splat on the floor. Awesome. Noble throws Kidman back in one two no. "You know, MacMan paid a lot of money to have me have loose lips out here, so listen to me up, let me earn my money." Anyway, Noble's working the back of the neck and there's a nice short clothesline to ground Kidman. One two no. Stomps. Straight jacket chinlock. Cat's weekly threat of physical violence on Josh, check. Cat has doubts that Matt can last with these guys. Then he segues into a tangent about how Josh should stop wearing ladies underwear to make weight. "Cat, what do you know about wearing ladies underwear?" "Hey, what I do on my own time is my own business." ANYWAY, Kidman battling up  out of the chinlock, kicks and punches out. Whip, reversed, I think that's a Noble back elbow but it wasn't really clean. Hanging Kidman on the bottom rope for the stomping and the second rope guillotine legdrop, but Kidman scoots out of the ring just in time. Kidman back up on the apron, shoulder to Noble and slingshot sunset flip in, but Noble adjusts, catches, and uses a modified Northern Lights Suplex one two no. Great work by Noble. Choke on the middle rope by Noble - there's the running sit on the neck. Noble stomping. Reverse neckbreaker one two no. Josh notes the gameplan - hey, and two of his finishers work for this one! Noble starts to do Raven's sitting hangman's neckbreaker hold, then opts not to risk a pink slip! Forearm to the chest, and back to the hold - it's more of a "to the side" variation, but thinking of Raven's move will get you the same picture. Josh even remembers how the (new) Sling Blade plays into this plan. Kidman trying to rally back - crowd comes with him. Up to his feet, back elbow, back elbow, turning around, Noble lifted into a fireman's carry and there's the knee neckbreaker. Both men are down, and I think Josh is trying his "we're about to go to the break so I'm going to tell you how important this is" voice, but he's no Cole. 

We're back, and Kidman is rallying back with right hands, so I don't think we missed much. Clothesline clothesline backdrop, it's Kidman's generic comeback. Noble retreats to the corner, Kidman charges in and gets boot. Noble wanders out and eats dropkick. One two no. This is a very filling match. Replay of the dropkick, because it was okay. Kidman tries a slam, Noble slips behind, Kidman tries a clothesline, Noble ducks and hooks an arm, Tiger Bomb gets a double leg takedown - "there's the jackknife one two NO!" Rebound clothesline but everyone sees this one coming - powerslam one two NO! Nidia can't believe that's not three. Noble back up, back suplex but Kidman lands on his feet, springboard bulldog is blocked - Exploder! One two NO. Noble oddly goes for a normal powerbomb, and Kidman reverses it. Now Nidia's up on the apron, distracting the ref from the count. Kidman is over, pushes Brian Hebner out of the way, blocks a Nidia right, pauses, moves out of the way as Nobel charges into here inside cradle one two NO! Backslide no Jamie slips loose, TIGER BOMB! One two NO! Josh said "new champion on Velocity!" which kinda ruined it for me but that thought is nice - he remembers that Noble won the title that way. Noble can't believe that didn't work. Whip, reversed, kick is caught, Kidman reverses to the Lo Down. Kidman drags him into position, going up - Shooting Star Press hits. One two three. (7:46) Well, I dunno if it's better than that first Tajiri/Kidman match but this was pretty good syndi fair, definitely. Replays of the SSP.

Josh hypes SmackDown one more time - Hogan/Rock is more important than Brock/Angle, one more graphic for that, wow.