sign I've lost it: I think I might actually watch 'Psych'.  

agony of defeat: I believe this is the 500th week in a row where I've seen the Heat lineup page, and screamed "NOOOOOO!". 

corporate open, show open. Is it just me, or is their no sound here? I've tried a few different times and still no, and it's fine for other segments. Maybe it'll get better?

Matt Striker (no sound) vs Snitsky (no sound) - it has not gotten better. I like how Snitsky's entrance video still starts with him cracking Kane in the back with a chair. Not so much since then. Referee Chad Patten calls for the bell, so I do have a start time. What I don't also have is a good match. Oh yay, Snitsky and Striker working armbars! How exciting. Snitsky's hair is far too combed to be believable. I can't imagine him sitting backstage, brushing his hair, thinking "I've got to look my best today!" Striker is so smart, he tries to slam Snitsky but is unable to do it because Snitsky's too big (really?) And then he points to his head before running into a back elbow, so I'm starting to think he's actually lying about this smart thing. Oh, yay, body part selling for Snitsky. I'm thinking he's not one of the approximately four people around these parts who can do such a thing well. Though he does find when crawling around. Chad heroically ignores the most blatant rope gab in the history of wrestling. Why is this match six minutes long? Someone lose a bet? Did I lose a bet? A minute of Striker doing a bad spinning toe hold is just uncalled for. Yep, Snitsky is fine the second his comeback starts, but starts bugging him again right when the story requires. It's nice that they can work Snitsky blowing a suplex into the story. (Striker pin w/feet on the ropes, 6:25)

WWE RAW magazine: DX

Shelton Benjamin (Orangeburg, SC, 248 pounds) vs Brad Allen (Fayetteville, NC, 220 pounds) - sound worked fine here. I blame WWE.com. Shelton is meant to be unhappy here, but he's doing a fine job of smiling thru his troubles I guess. Coach informs us that Shelton hates the words "former." Would it be cool if I called him the quondam IC champion? Oh, I guess Coach and Todd are you announcers for this Heat #419. Your ref here is Jack. We have to wait forever for Shelton take off his gear. Then he has issues with Brad's gear. Hey, call for the bell. Talking and talking. SLAP. There's the bell. Shelton over him with with right hands. Shelton pulling up Alan by his hair to talk to him. Whip, North Carolina Slam. Allen brought over to the ropes for more ANGRY punches. He's walked away, but comes back with kicks and knees. Boot comes close to Allen, which causes him to tumble out of the ring. Brad brought back in. Half straight jacket camel clutch choke. Hipchecks to the head? I guess. Good friend Coach just keeps telling me how angry angry Shelton is. Now he's dragging Brad Allen around by his hair. Allen shoved into the corner. And again. Shelton charges in, but Brad moves out of the way. Forearms by Brad. Whip, reversed, and Brad back with a fivearm. Allen with a kick, DDT - eh, no, Shelton shoved him off. I think Shelton is actually going to do moves and try to win now - superkick. Knees to the midsection, forearms to the back. T-Bone. One two three. (3:29) Shelton throws Brad out of the ring so he can pose with on distractions. 

SNME

DX on RAW. Shane said crap, and he sure got that. Good they played the wacky music and show people laughing so I'd know this was supposed to be funny. Hey, if Vince runs the show, why didn't he just stop that sooner? I guess I'm supposed to not think again. (3:31)

Vengeance replay ad

Rob Conway (Atlantic City, NJ, 220 pounds) vs Eugene (Louisville, KY, 232 pounds) - Todd points out Conway's a big loser. A previously recorded Conway promo! "You know the Con Man been on a big losing streak lately. Well, tonight, Eugene, if you think you're going to beat me, you better jump me from behind the same way you did last week. You see, I need, more than anything, to beat you, and prove that I'm not a loser! The Con Man is a winner!" Your ref is Mike. Eugene gets the crowd chant. Rob refuses to shake once again. Circle. Lockup, Conway inside cradle one two no. No, it's two Rob. Circle. Lockup, armbar, Conway headlock, double wristlock reversal, no Conway gets the headlock back. I guess Todd was "at the World Cup" last week, or at least that's the running gag. Conway shot off, shoulderblock back one two no. Headlock by Conway again. Cranking it in. Eugene trying to start a chant - one guy goes with it. Conway rolls backwards to get free. Conway charges, and gets an eye poke. Whip, reversed, Conway leapfrogs, and Eugene catches him with a inverted atomic drop. Eugene with chops to the head, drop toe hold, and yes, riding him like a horse. Coach: "Take it guy who's been ridden-" How about no. Eugene screwed around with Choida, and turns into a clothesline from Conway. Reverse neckbreaker. One two NO. Back suplex, one two NO. Conway really wants that win. Conway works over Eugene in the corner with right hands until he's forced out, and then he's bright back in with a boot choke. Choke on the ropes. Conway mocks the Eugene chant, thus restarting it. Choke around the ropes. Forearm to the chest. Conway argues with the ref, then covers - one two no. I've got lucha and Heat on monitors at the same time, I keep having to rewind this because Heat sure ain't winning. Eugene escapes to the apron, gets in a few shoulders to the midsection, slingshot sunset flip, Conway fights it, but he's going down. One two no. Conway with a sleeper. He's going to take this all the way down. Scissoring the leg while he's at it. Announcers are speculating that if Conway where to lose here, he might be done. One arm - no, no arm drop, Eugene rallying. Crowd not going with him at all. Eugene rams Conway into the corner a couple times to get free. Conway out of the corner, Eugene picks him up, and it's airplane spin. The crowd does react to that. Conway's put down, and they both stumble. They end up leading in on each other, keeping each other up. Eugene Russian legsweep. Eugene tries to add an elbow drop, but Conway's moved. Head into the buckle - oops. Conway never learns. YOU. Right. Left. Right. Left. Windup - and Conway kills him with a dropkick! One two thr-NO! Slam, no Eugene slips behind, Conway shoved in the ropes, and Eugene gets in a big boot. Mixed reaction to the ear cupping. Off the ropes, legdrop, one two NO. Coach: "That may be the first person in the history of the business to ever kick out of the Hulk Hogan legdrop!" Well, no. Eugene's distraught, but he still manages to spinebuster Conway. How's he going to do this with no elbow pad? Oh, he just pretends he has one. off the ropes, over, back - and into a Conway powerslam! Conway's fire dup, but Conway ain't pinning. Conway going up. Nice knowing you, Rob. Middle rope - leg lariat connects! One two thr-NO! Best just to give it up. This is the best Conway/Eugene match in forever, already. Conway's got the bright idea he might try this finisher here; hanging spinning DDT works, but it's close - one two foot on the ropes! Conway has no idea the match is still going. Choida has to pantomiming the whole thing out three times. I'm thinking about to pull of the inside cradle, but I guess Conway just isn't close enough. Conway turns, reaches down - there's the small package. One two three. (7:52) "Conway goes down again!" If you say so, Todd. Eugene can't even believe he won. I think Conway is starting to believe he lost again. Rob: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO." Me too!

That's it.