company open, show open.

Matt Striker (New York City, 237 pounds) vs Jason Statec ("already in the ring, right here in Rochester, NY", 245 pounds, already in the ring) - "Hi everyone, welcome to Heat. I'm Jim Ross, accompanied by Jonathon Coachman." QUE? Your ref is Mickie J. JR slips up immediately and calls him Coach, and then apologizes (!) because he doesn't want any commentator arguing on this show. For his part, Coach doesn't want talk about what happened on RAW. I'm totally down with all of this. If only they could make this not a Matt Striker match. JR goes over the one talking point we have about Striker (same as the first day.) It's funny to have Coach talk to JR about "talent" and "the front office", that's for sure. JR accurately notes that teachers are grossly underpaid and Striker will make the real money if he succeeds in WWE. Crowd noise is either insane for a Matt Striker match or badly dubbed/miced. JR says "upside"; I wonder who he's got going first in the draft. I actually wonder if he saw any Hornets games, but that's for another time. Coach mentions the Rock - get well, the Rock! Striker wins on a fujiwara armbar? Huh. (2:51) He'd been working the arm the whole time, but that was still surprising. JR had no idea the finish was coming, which is interesting. Striker elbow drops the bad arm one more time for good measure.

Vengeance: DX

Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch (532 pounds) vs Jeff Star & Dave Danger (490 pounds, already in the ring) - JR has a plethora of Murdoch redneck lines. Trevor promises they're going to talk while they fight again, but I'm ignoring them unless they got something to say. Lance yells that he wants to start; it's odd that he's the fired up one and Trevor's laid back, because we started this the other way. Your ref is Chad. Lance introduces himself with a slap to the face of - that looks like a Jeff Star. Rubbing his face into the mat, raking his fake. Murdoch gets bleeped, though I'm guessing not live. Corner whip, running back elbow. Jeff thrown down, tag to Trevor, hold for a Trevor punch to the midsection. Back elbow to the chest. Stomp. Oh god, Cade's talking now. Running big boot by Murdoch is much better than Cade's talking. One - pulled up. Suplex one two pulled up. Why are you covering him? Cade tagged in, Trevor holds him for a kick. Cade demands (we're assuming) Jeff tag in Dave Danger (JR: "If that is his real name" - HMMMM.) Dave's the bigger one of the two. Cade works him over in the corner. The announcers are admitting that they have no idea. They figure this is Jeff Starr, based on the stars on his outfit, but so does the other guy. Trevor tags in and kicks Dave around. "That one's for you momma, that one's for you daddy, and this one's for me just for being fat and ugly!" Big kick to the ribs there. Tag (sorta.) Stop giving the mic to Cade! Stomp and talking. Tag to Murdoch. Middle rope flying punch. Slam. Off the rope, back elbow one two picked him up. JR's making fun of Cade's talking now. Crossface forearms by Trevor. Tag to Cade and Murdoch gets the microphone. "I've seen pretty faces on dog turds than this guy." JR thinks that's a bit too far, and Coach promises a fine! Cade legdrop. Cade elbow drop. Tag to Murdoch, holding Danger, kick to the face. JR wonders when Murdoch and Cade will win the belts they keep talking about. Talking. Tag to Cade. Running punch. This bit is great for Murdoch and horrible for Cade. Cade talks too much and gets punched - they're actually going to get the hot tag? Now, Cade tags Murdoch and Murdoch dropkicks him. One more tag, and Murdoch channels Don Meredith. "The lights are out/the parties' over." (Well, close.) Sour And Sour-er. One two three. (6:09) JR, out of nowhere: "I wonder who these two guys are picking in the big WWE title match at Vengeance." QUE?

Vengeance: RVD vs Edge. Oh.

JR reads copy. Obviously. DX returns on RAW. Midget backsides can't be shown on Heat, and thank god for that. (2:25)

Judgment Day ad? It's a little late for the encore, but that's what they're shilling doing here.

Rob Conway (Atlantic City, NJ, 230 pounds) vs Val Venis (Las Vegas, NV, 224 pounds) - Coach likes doing commentary with JR when they're not actually fighting. Where is Todd? Where is Josh or Romero (aaaah scary) for that matter. When gambling hubs collide! Val's apparently dropped some weight in his injury time. He's wearing a pad over his right elbow. Val dragging on his walk to the ring. Is he back to giving away the towel away again? No. Your ref is Jack. Circle. Lockup. Into the ropes, break, with Conway getting in a shove and Val shoving back. Lockup, Conway with a waistlock, Val trying to break, switched, takedown. Val grabs a front facelock, up into a headlock, shot off, back with a shoulderblock, one no, side headlock takeover, lean back pin one, rolled back, lean back pin one, lean back pin one, lean way back and now Val's being pinned one two no, Val stands back up with headlock on. Shot off, over, under, shoulderblock, Val shoulderblock, One two no. Side headlock takedown again. Lean back, one no. Conway backs him in the corner, and gets in the cheap shot punch. Right. Conway's letting his hair grow uut a bit. Stomps. Corner whip, reversed, Conway kips up and out, Val chops him as he charges. One more. Whip, running with him knee, and now, the other way. I bet it's a Russian legsweep next. Russian legsweep! Standing over him. Hipswivel, mounted punches. Val argues with the ref about closed fists while Conway rolls to the apron. Val after him, but he gets a shoulder to the midsection. Conway trying for a suplex out, blocked, Val's suplex blocked, both guys get blocked again. Conway with forearms, and he's going to try again - still no. Val finally gets it - only took six tries. Val off the ropes, elbow drop, but Conway gets his knee up. Val's grabbing his previously hurt elbow, which is now his currently hurt elbow. Val rolls to the apron to buy himself some time, but Conway bull rushes him off the corner, and sends him into the barricade. Conway goes out and collects him. Val worked over in the corner, Conway punching Val's side and stomping him. Is this a long Coach over dub? Guess so. Val laid down on the mat, and dropkicked back first into the post. Stomp, abdominal stretch. Conway DOES grab the ropes. He's got it once. JR name drops Wilbur Snyder as the inventor of the abdominal stretch. He's got it twice now, but Doan at least noticed the ropes move. Conway reaches for the ropes again, and that allows Val to hiptoss out. Val firing back with punches, but Conway stops him with a kick. Conway off the ropes, big boot right to Val's face. Crowd noise is way down from earlier. Val retreats to a corner, and Conway charges - into a back elbow. Val out with a clothesline, there's another, how about a back elbow. Chop, whip, head down too soon, and it gets kicked. Conway puts on a sleeper, but Val quickly reverse it into the back suplex powerbomb one two no. Val checking on his elbow. Val corner clothesline. Another. A third. This can't work a fourth - yea, boot. Conway charges out into his half nelson slam, which JR decides is a "urange". He's trying, at least. JR hates Heyman speech here. Val thinking about the Money Shot. Heading up, but taking a long route, and Conway stops him with a punch. Superplex? Blocked. Val punches him, and shoves him off. Going for it. Money Shot connects! One two three. (8:42) Coach tells JR to "do your normal great job" at Vengeance. So weird. That's it.