TV PG LV CC entertainment open
Rodney Mack (Lafayette, Louisiana, 280 pounds, w/o Jazz) vs Val Venis (Las Vegas, Nevada, 244 pounds) - your ring announcer is Justin Jason Roberts. Val has new tights, which seems like a tremendously unwise investment at this point in time. Circle. Rodney with headlock, into a hammerlock, Val with a switch. Val's shaved his head and tanned enough to make this slightly confusing at times. They're both wearing black tights, black kneepads and black wristtape. The illuminating difference: Rodney is wearing firebrick red boots, while Val has salmon colored ones. Mack back elbows out of the hammerlock, pulls Val into a headlock, and takes him down. Headscissors reversal, Mack slips free, standoff. More like Mack backing off, and complaining about the hair pull. Chad Patten finds that ludicrous. Mack tries kicking Val instead, and that's just as unsuccessful when Val catches it, spins him and drops him with an atomic drop. Armdrag, armbar. Mack backs (again with that) Val into the ropes, and gives him a knee to the gut to break free. Right hand, Val battling back with a chop, chop, right, chop, right and Mack uses Chad as an obstacle to get in an eye poke. Pounding Val down in the corner with punches. Todd fantasy books Maven's RAW with a Maven/Coach vs Tag Team Champions main event; Coach doesn't like that idea. Whip, running with him knee, running with him knee, side Russian legsweep one two no. Val right hand, whip, quick reverse into a powerslam one two no. Mack with an elbow drop to the back, elbow drop to the back, knee drop to the back, cover one two no. Mack with mounted punches for Val. One two no. Bodyscissors weardown. Edge said some not nice things about Coach in his new book (Coach: "Over the Edge or On The Edge or whatever it's called") , but Coach is willing to put it aside because they're both heels now. Mack adds a chinlock. Val eventually gets to the ropes, and punches Mack away fro following up - but Mack runs over him with a boot. Val's only momentarily stopped, and starts coming back with punches again. Mack gets the better of the punches, whip, head down too soon, Val kick sit and clotheslines Mack over. Mack with a clothesline, back elbow, whip, reversed, reversed into the half nelson suplex - no, blocked. Mack elbows out. Mack off the ropes, into a Val spinebuster. Val going up. Much to Coach's surprise, the Money Shot hits, one two three. (4:51) And then Heat GM Steven Richards runs to the ring and fires Rodney Mack! (no)
Your announcers are Coach and Todd. Coach was iffy on the whole Survivor Series pay per view before, but he's sold now!
Tonight: Molly Holly & Jazz vs Victoria and Nidia
Next: William Regal
Wrangler presents Shelton Benjamin beating Viscera on Monday. Viscera! Also Christian after a failed attack.
William Regal (Blackpool, England, 240 pounds) vs Ken Anderson (225 pounds, already in the ring) - Todd related an entertaining misunderstand about ribs he had with Ivory on Experience - well, except for the entertaining part. Quite like Regal's new entertaining music. Coach: "Well, we know Ivory's an idiot, we know that, you don't have to tell me that." I believe Ken Anderson is stalking Todd Grisham! Red tights versus red tights, although they've differed on the boots and kneepads (Regal red vs Ken black.) Lockup, Regal forces Ken into the corner, Ken turns it around, Chris Kay demands a break and kinda has to force it. Lockup, Regal with a headlock. Coach almost addresses what shall not be spoken about today: "There are a lot of up and coming youngsters that we're going to be seeing over the next few weeks" and then he goes on to hype Ken Anderson? Odd from Coach. Regal can't get the snap mare, so gets in a punch and back to the headlock. Shot off, back with a shoulderblock, one no. Regal with a headlock, headlock takedown. Todd talks about how Ken Anderson has two jobs just to be able to wrestle. Armbar by Regal, Anderson backed into the corner for a pair of European uppercuts. Regal has more trouble with a snap mare but eventually gets in, and adds a knee drop. Regal gives Ken many knees to the head, and knocks him over with another European uppercut. One, no. Full nelson. Ken gets into the ropes to bring it. Ken gets in a devastating punch to the gut form Regal's reaction, and one to the head. Corner whip, Regal walks up the corner to stop himself, and rebounds into a back elbow - Regal actually sweeps Ken's legs on the fall, but Ken is quick back up. Ken slams him, one two no. Ken with a shot to the midsection. Shoulder to the midsection, holding it into to put pressure on Regal's midsection. I keep thinking there's some sort of back story for Regal selling all the midsection stuff huge, but it was Regal who knuckled Snitsky in the midsection on Monday, not the other way around. Maybe something else was supposed to happen? He's selling like he's got broken ribs without the rib tape at any rate. Snap mare, forearm to the back. Regal gets back to his feet, wristlock, but Ken stops him with a shot to the midsection. Ken backs Regal into the corner, shoulder to the midsection, shoulder to the midsection. Ken gets backed off, and walks into a kick, kick, Regal left handed punching his way back into this. Corner whip, clothesline. Coach says "snug." Butterfly suplex one two no. One two No. One two NO. One two NO! Wanna try again? No. Regal back to the kneelifts, and a release t-bone suplex? Okay. Running knee to the head, Regal says "finish" to Ken, one two three. (4:16) Hey, he was right! What the heck was with this match. Someone ought to get fired or something. Did the crowd really got nuts for Regal winning on a running knee?
Next: Benoit offers to take on La Resistance by himself! So it's all his fault.
Shawn Daviri was so much cooler with the carpet. We clip out Hassan asking for the translation, so we're not even specifying a language. (1:12) Todd seems to be on Hassan's side.
Benoit and Edge vs La Resistance. No blood on this show! "How
disgruntled can one man be?" (5:07)
RAW: Chris Benoit vs Edge. Yea right.
Next: Chuck Palumbo vs Rosey
Juicebox presents Trish calling Lita a loser - what, no donuts? - and Lita attacking. Lots of help those camouflage pants are when you're charging right at someone, Lita. Hey, look, Gail Kim.
Rosey (375 pounds) vs Custom Chucky P! (San Diego, CA, 289 pounds) - man, it must be tough to have all those moving expenses and then be employed - at least he's moving TO California instead of away from it. Oh no, he even got a new jacket and pants, how sad. Meanwhile, SmackDown! your vote takes credit for 4.6 million more 18-29 year olds who voted in the 2004 election. Because there was nothing else going on. Coach tells us about his congratulatory call to President Bush! Coach: "I would've been happy with either one." Coach hates Nader! Todd accuses Coach of voting for Coach. Coach is too busy to be president right now, but may consider a run in 2008, though he would shoot for 2012. Todd segues horribly back to the match, which has been every Heat match ever to open. Chuck is working on Rosey's shoulder, but takes a short clothesline. Corner clothesline. Headbutt. standing over Chuck, asking the crowd, and a big sit on Chuck, one two no. Rosey with punches, corner whip, into a Chuck big boot. Rosey thrown hard into the corner, shoulder first. Coach: "This is a very angry Chuck Palumbo we're seeing in the ring right now." No kidding. Bet he was angrier a little bit later. Coach says it's because he lost to Benoit. Rosey's left arm is smashed into the post. Punch. Hipcheck to shoulder. And again. Stomps. One two no. Chinlock. Rosey battling back, back elbows, but Chuck stops him with a forearm to the back. Whip, reversed oddly, head down too soon, Chuck kicks it, and delayed discus punch isn't as cool, one two no. Chuck with a right, Rosey right, Chuck right, Rosey right, Chuck right, Rosey right, Rosey clothesline. Todd: "I go to the gym five days a week, lift all I can, and I still weight a buck oh five." Rosey with another clothesline, whip, reverse, shoulderblock back. Off the ropes, headbutt drop one two NO. Corner whip, Rosey charges into nothing, Chuck off the ropes big boot is ducked, big Rosey slam. Going up! Second rope. Samoan Jam, one two three. (3:56) And just like that, Chuck is gone. Really - he rolled out of the ring in record time.
Next: the one time Triple H says he's not there and really not there, it comes back to haunt him.
Monday - Austin, TX [RAW] - hey look, Gail Kim
Next Sunday - Cleveland, OH [SS]
Next Monday - Indianapolis, IN [RAW]
Next Next Friday - Detroit, MI
Next Next Saturday - Kingston, ON
Todd and Coach talk about how fair or not the main event was
Video package treatment for the recap. Hey, they don't miss the Mist this
Survivor Series: Jericho, Benoit, Maven, Orton vs Edge, Snitsky, Batista, Triple H Classic Survivor Series Elimination Match for Absolute Control of RAW.
Tonight: Molly Holly & Jazz vs Victoria and Nidia
Molly Holly & Jazz vs Victoria and Nidia in a Divas Tag Team Match - Victoria and Nidia dance like it's their last dance together! Batista and Coach are going to the Cavs game together on Friday. Ric Flair may or may not be pushed down in the process. Jazz and Victoria to start. Circle. Lockup, Jazz with a headlock, back into a hammerlock, into a double wristlock, reversed back into a headlock. Jazz yells at Jack Down for yelling at her about haripulling. Headlock punch by Jazz. Turnbuckle smash. Turnbuckle smash - no, blocked, and Jazz gets a face full of turnbuckle, twice, three times. Ugly armdrag, slightly less ugly armdrag, armbar. Jazz forearms out, and tags to Molly. Molly charges into a powerslam one two no. Nidia comes into argue - something Jazz did we didn't see? Whatever, it allows Jazz to help Molly block a monkey flip. Snap suplex by Molly, one two no. Hair beal. Molly talking trash. Front facelock, forearm to the back. Todd remembers Victoria shaved Molly's hair! Good for him. Tag to Jazz. Jazz with a slam, off the ropes, elbow drop, elbow drop to stop Victoria from crawling to the corner a third just for fun. Front facelock, rolling forward into a bridge to crank Victoria's neck even more. Jazz lets go of the hold to turn Victoria over and spin one two no. Tag to Molly, holding Victoria for a kick. Victoria thrown into the mat. Leg choke on the middle rope. Molly yells at Chad Patten so Jazz can get in another shot. Molly tags Jazz back in. Scoop, carrying Victoria around on her shoulder - Michinoku Driver! Cover her! One two NO. Jazz whips Victoria, Victoria back with a sunset flip, Jazz tries to block it but Victoria pulls her down, one two no. Both up, both clotheslining, both down. Crowd trying to rally Victoria to the corner. Crawling, crawling, tag to Molly, tag to Nidia for the first time. Clothesline for Molly clothesline for Jazz, scary flapjack for Molly. Jazz's right an is ducked, and Nidia spins her around into a spinning neckbreaker. Kick to the midsection for Molly, Northern Lights Suplex one two NO! The irony would've been ironic if that worked. Molly is whipped, Nidia tries a dropkick but Molly has the ropes. Todd: "Unfortunately, Mo Vaughn not with us tonight." Don't ask. Molly going up. Molly Go Round? YES. TODD CALLS IT. one two three. (4:58) That's it, you're FIRED. Victoria and Molly check on their partners - wow, symbolic.
That's it. For a lot.