It's nice to know, no matter how time pasts and creative people change, the time honored tradition of announcing one conclusion to a RAW cliffhanger on Sunday Night Heat and completely contradicting it the following day on RAW will never be forgotten.

TV PG LV CC entertainment open no fireworks

Gail Kim (Korea) vs Nidia (Puerrrrrrrrrrrto Rrrico) - that sounds like Justin Jason Roberts instead of the Fink, and Todd instead of Coach. I bet we get confirmation on at least one of those. They do the Sponsored By ad spot in this match, which presumably means something with wrong with the planned opener; maybe the desk shot with someone who's not calling the matches for whatever reason? Rrrrroberrrrrrrts love the r's. Nidia's boobs say "Sexy". Well, I guess that's the cloth stretched to it's limits over them, but that's not as fun to say. Type. Whatever. Lockup. Headlock tag down by Gail. Nidia with a headscissors, Gail kips out out, Nidia zero leg trio, Gail fighting back with a legsweep and a dropkick to the head. One two no. Headlock. Al's theme for the hour sounds like "everyone's working even harder than usual in hopes the fans will vote for them!" Nidia elbows, armdrags out, double arm yank. Todd: "Coach is not here this week, I'm filling in, and so far, I'm doing pretty bad, wouldn't you agree Al?" "Absolutely." One two no. Nidia with a headlock, whip, backdrop. Al agrees with a Todd point by breaking on a Funaki "inDEED." Gail grabs the ropes, and gets pulled off hard. Shoulder to the midsection. Armbar, twist, Gail using a hairpull to take control. Forearms with the armbar/wristlock still on, running up the corner OH NO she slipped and fell! On the grand scale of "horrible Gail Kim accidents while attempting something cool", this botched Mexican armdrag wasn't her worst looking accidental bump (she mostly fell on her back), but looked like a complete screw up. Gail grabs her head, then grabs her (previously injured) shoulder and I'm just hoping it's an angle. Announcers are noting her past screw ups, and Nidia shows the tentativeness usually only seen in fake injury angles, so I have hope - more so when Gail leverages Nidia out of the ring when she goes after her. Gail gets up - because she's fine. Hahaha. Quite the elaborate way to set up throwing your opponent out of the ring, but at least it wasn't a phony knee injury. Hope she really doesn't screw up now. Gail brings Nidia in, one two NO. Stomp. Turnbuckle smash. Kick, kick, kick, snap mare. Kick to the back. Knee drop, one two NO. Gail with a conventional choke, letting go at three. Short clothesline. Gail taunts the crowd. Suplex - no, Nidia small package one two NO. Gail clothesline ducked under and hooked into a backslide one two NO. Gail with a kick, scoop, but Nidia's weight (?!?) causes her to fall on top of Gail, one two NO. Nidia with a forearm, forearm, whip, quick reverse into a kick, step over into the Octopus (says Al - close enough.) Nidia manages to get free and hiptoss out. Forearm battle, Nidia winning but Gail forcing her into the corner with a kneelift. Gail backs up, charges in, and eats a boot. Nidia clothesline, clothesline, kick, Northern Lights suplex one two NO. Too bad that move never works. Kick, Northern Lights suplex again one two NO. That move never works, Nidia! "What is going to take for one of these Divas to take the win!" I can guess what won't work. Nidia grabs a waistlock, but Gail breaks it some mysterious back headbutt way. Nidia retreats to the ropes, Gail walks over, and Nidia flapjacks her onto the top rope. Both are stumbling around, but Gail blocks a whip and drops Nidia with a single leg takedown - Stretch Muffler! Nidia ain't going anywhere - she's done. (6:03) Don't mess with mess with the submission expert.

Tonight: Rodney Mack (w/Jazz) vs Steven Richards
Next: Diva Search Winner

Since I've got a feeling we won't be seeing the announcers, I'll squeeze in here that they are Todd and Al for Heat #321 (contact). One would think this is Al's last Heat for a while; next week, SmackDown! takes over for No Mercy, and you'd have to assume Tough Enough activities, if only in casting form, would start to take place by the following Thursday. Stranger things have happened than Al being a big part of the A-Show on one side of this divide while announcing for the B-Show on the other, so who knows until it actually happens.

Diva Search Look Back (3:18)
Diva Search Winner, just after this message from Trish to drag it out for ratings purposes. I thought it was a bad idea for Coach to mention 8,000 people tried out; to me, eight thousand seems like a low turn out if you're promising television time and $250,000 to the winner. (4:58)

RAW: Christy is the guest of honor for Trish's party

Next: Sniskty is a dead man.

RAW Live
Monday - Kansas City, MO [RAW]
Friday - Portland, ME
Saturday - Burlington, VT
Sunday - Binghamton, NY
Next Monday - Madison Square Garden [RAW]

But Sniskty isn't the only one dying. (2:10)

Walking Tall and Laying Out IC Contenders

Val Venis (Las Vegas, NV, 234 pounds) vs Chuck Palumbo (280 pounds) - Chuck's decided this gimmick isn't worth the blond hair dye evidently. Both guys shove at each other even before the bell rings, and immediately lockup. While it's a nice effort to go with the theme of trying to impress the fans for votes, what are the odds either of them will be eligible for any sort of vote in the first place? Chuck slowly walks Val into the corner, but Val turns it around at the last instance. Chuck hides in the ropes to force the break, and gets in an eye poke as Val is forced out by Mike Choida. Palumbo back suplex, one no, one two no. He should try again, but he doesn't. Coming up: Regal on Taboo Tuesday and Eugene. Corner whip, Val rebounds out, Chuck drives him back in. Shoulder to the midsection. Kick to the head. Stomps. Val gets in a kick, bunt still gets punched. Suplex. One two no. Al uses Just For Men. Todd: "You and Rico need to get together." "No, I went out on a date with him once and it didn't work out. He wanted to go Dutch, the only time I do that is when we go to Europe." Chuck grabs Val in a silly looking cravate, decides it looks silly, and puts on a camel clutch. Val tries to break out, and Chuck sits down on his back. Val pushed chest first into the back, and given a forearm on the rebound. Slapping the back of Val's head. Val sent into the ropes again, and a forearm again. Forearm. Forearm. Whip, reversed, Val spinebuster. Val's pumped. Going up already? Money Shot - eats knees! Chuck played especially dead near the end, so that was pretty funny. Scoop into the Samoan drop one two three. (3:18) That was pretty one sided; Val never got his comeback.  

WM21 press conference highlights. (1:00)
Next: Randy Orton and Vince McMahon book the finish of the main event

Day of Reckoning for Eugene and Eric

Thru the magic of "Coach isn't here so we're covering", Todd magically is backstage for an interview with William Regal. How does he feel about Taboo Tuesday, Eugene vs Eric, and the stipulations: 
Regal: "Do you know, I would love to see Eric Bischoff boiled in oil. That's what I would like to see." 
Todd: "With all due respect, I don't believe that's one of the possible choices. How about the loser has to wear a dress?" 
Regal: "What about, if we just cover him from head to toe in strawberry jam, and let a million fire ants have their wicked way with him? How about that, I'd like to see that one." 
Todd: "That would be very entertaining, but I don't think that was one of the possible choices. The loser has to become the winners servant?"
Regal: "How about feeding to the piranhas or a death of a thousand cuts, something like that? Rip his eyelids off and dip his head in hot soaking water, something along that lines?"
Todd: "How about the third possible choice, the loser's head is shaved bald? Pretty good?"
Regal: "Actually, I like that one, because I do know that dear Uncle Eric, he loves his hair, I-I think I do like that, because, I mean, in a dress, or a servant, that's over rather quickly, but it takes a long time to grow your hair back, I do like that, I would like to see Eric Bischoff with a bald head."
Todd: "Now, were Eugene to lose, he'd have to shave his head, how do you think he'd look?"
Regal: "Don't be silly, dear boy. Eugene's not going to lose, he's got me on his side."

What have we learned? These stipulations suck! (And we're supposed to vote for hair/hair.)

Speaking of voluntary mandatory choices, here's the main event. Do you believe someone actually thought "how's the best way to make Shelton's return mean something?" before coming up with this plan? We see Orton getting KOed, then skip ahead to late. So what did happen in the back to cause Orton to pop back to complete freshness like that? Maybe there's actually two Randy Orton's, which allows him to pull off tricks like this and the week where he was kicked out of the building but still able to interfere in the main event. (4:04)

Tonight: Rodney Mack vs Steven Richards

If we're pretending the Simon System commercial isn't part of the show, do I have to recap it?

Rodney Mack (Lafayette, Louisiana, 280 pounds, w/Jazz) vs Steven Richards (Philadelphia, PA, 230 pounds) - they've switched Mack music again. Steven rushes the ring, knocking Mack right of it. Steven's pumped. Steven side steps a Mack charge and gets in to a punch battle with him, actually winning. Mack's clotheslined out. Mack's got the pistol pants going again. Mack back in, right hand blocked, Steven right, right, Mack stops him with a knee. Mack with a forearm to the back. Whip, reversed into a short kick by Steven. Steven heads for the ropes, stops when he sees Jazz there, turns, ducks a Mack clothesline, and knocks down Mack with a punch. Mack to the outside - Steven apron dive plancha! Al's theorizing this is also Taboo Tuesday related, but I'm guessing it might just as much be making up for his last performance. Steven pounds Mack with punches on the outside. Steven throws Mack in, and in after him. Elbow drop to the back of the neck, one two NO. Steven off the ropes, and this time he forget about Jazz and she stopped him. Steven goes out after her, but Mack stops him with a kick from inside the ring. Mack draws away Jack Down, and Jazz smashes his face into the steps. Mack goes out to collect Steven, one two no. Forearm to the back. Steven knocked into the corner for more forearms and right hands. Reverse neckbreaker. One two no. Chinlock. Mack lets go for a bit to punch Steven some and cover him for tow. Back to the chinlock. Steven tries to draw from the crowd. Rallying back, and using a jawbreaker to get out. Steven stops Mack with a dropkick to the stomach, probably not where he meant. Mack tries to get at Steven, and gets elbowed away. Mack charges again, and gets flapjacked off the ropes. Steven off the ropes, clothesline. Clothesline. Chop. Whip, sideslam one two NO. Jazz up on the apron to yell at Jack Doan for no particular reason, and Mack uses the opening to get in a low blow on Steven. Ghetto Blaster one two three. (3:48) Time to thug/bug.

That's it.