WWF Metal
Televised: 06/16/01


JOE GAGNE RULES!

WWF Metal

ESSA RIOS vs. SEAN EVANS
Essa with the tear off pants. WhatEVER. They circle, lockup, Evans with a side headlock, but Essa with the breadbasket elbows, Evans pushed into the ropes and bounces off with a shoulderblock. A little bit more of this foolishness goes and Essa clotheslines Evans out of the ring. Essa with his running somersault crossbody out of the corner onto Evans. Essa SWIVELS! Hooray. Back in the ring, Essa with a fireman's carry slam, but misses a springboard legdrop. Evans with punches and actually nails an enziguri. Evans tries a suplex, but Essa reverses into a Northern Lights suplex for 2. Essa with a couple of short arm clothesline and he does this crazy bouncing stuff off the top rope while holding Evans' hand. I feel like shoving Essa off. Afterwards, Essa hits a slam for 2. Evans also hits a sweet Tornado DDt by holding onto Essa and climbing up the ropes at the same time. That was for 2. Evans with a headscissors. Essa gets the advantage somewhere and a moonsault does it for a pin, thus the win! 

EDGE and CHRISTIAN say stuff about KOTR. Both think they're going to win it. They also are wearing my tee shirt. 

RAVEN vs. BRAD HUNTER
Circle, lockup into corner with Hunter backing away, Raven punches a lot. Ref break, which leads to a Hunter boot, but Raven hits a drop toe hold, an armdrag and a clothesline out of the ring. Raven pulls Hunter from the floor onto the apron and lays some forearms onto his chest. Hunter's bent onto the top rope, you see. Hunter falls off the canvas, so Raven comes out. Raven hits a side Russian legsweep onto the barricade. Meet the steel steps, Brad Hunter! Raven gets back into the ring, but makes a mistake of pulling Hunter into the ring: Hunter nails a hangman. Brad with either a leg lariat or a flying back elbow. A scoop slam and also, hmm…Hunter looks to be going for a quebrada but actually hits a foreward roll off the second rope. I've seen this once and didn't like it. Probably from Rodney. Raven with a CCW and hits one of those Kidman clotheslines. There's a kneelift and another CCW, leading to an avalanche. There's a running clothesline and the Raven Effect for the 1,2,3.

Hayes wants to evenflow Stacy Kiebler. 

Clips of that whole fiasco involving Stacy Kiebler and her visible thong. I did not mind at all. 

K KWIK and JACQUELINE vs. IVORY and HAKU
My mother says Ivory's going to get her ass kicked cuz Jackie's a black woman and they are experts at singing and ass kicking. She also fears Haku's afro. Ivory bum rushes Jackie and we have our pull apart brawl quite early. Kwik tries to kick some ass, but c'mon now, this is the mighty Haku. Haku's eye gouge is great. There's a suplex. But he misses a frog splash from the second rope. It LOOKED like a frog splash. Kwik with a dropkick for 2. Crossbody for 2, as Ivory breaks the count. Now, the women run around the ring. Jackie runs into Haku, who gives her a bearhug. Kwik just levels Haku by spearing his legs. Jackie is kicking a lot of ass. Because she is BLACK. Haku does hit a flapjack. Ivory tags in, but misses an elbow drop. Tag into Jackie and she comes in and punches, back elbow, dropkick, clotheslines and holy shit POWERBOMB for the 1 2 3. DAMN Jackie IS Tough Enough! Kwik dances, as Haku basically has to carry Ivory out. 

SMACK OF THE WEEK: Spike has sex with Molly on RAW. 

Clips of Austin doing lots of stuff.

SARA'S DOING STUFF TOO WHO COULD IT BE???

JERRY LYNN vs. TAKA MICHINOKU [w/ Funaki]
Kaientai is evil. InDEED. Circle, lockup, TAKA with a kneelift and side headlock. Pushed into the ropes, TAKA hits a shoulderblock. Lynn with a headscissors and TAKA goes to the outside. Lynn with a baseball slide and hits a pescado onto Kaientai. Lynn with punches, whip, TAKA with a leapfrog, but lands awkwardly on his knee. Lynn tries to capitalize by bouncing off the ropes, but Funaki grabs his leg. Funaki might have hit a hangman as well. Lynn turns around and BAM there's a snappy kick to the fuckin' head by TAKA! Damn, he really is evil! TAKA with a seated dropkick. Later on, Lynn tries a German suplex, but TAKA lands on his feet. Lynn does that weird sunset flip out of the corner somewhere around this part. They start chopping each other, with Lynn getting the advantage, until TAKA hits an eyepoke. There's a couple chops to the throat! Lynn rolls out of a powerbomb after a one count. This crowd rules! WRESTLING! YEAH! Lynn with a back body drop, clothesline, but here's Funaki on the apron! Some stuff happens and Lynn hits a tremendous looking Tornado DDT to seal up this well-earned victory!

PERRY SATURN and TERRI host HeAT (again) tonight!
TAKA challenges JEFF HARDY for the Light Heavyweight Title tonight!
ONLY ON HeAT! TOMORROW NIGHT at 7PM! BYE! 

grandhassan@yahoo.com


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