AAA Mini Line - 10/15/05 (#670)

Back again. Hasn't been near long enough.

This is TripleMania XIII.

Match 1: Charly Manson (c), Hator, Mr. Aguila vs Electroshock (c), Shima, Intocable
Plaza De Toros Nuevo Progreso De Guadalajara, 05/15/05 
Winner:
Tecnicos (Cima b Charly)
Match Time: 13:59
Notes: Joined post entrances. Shima's the name they use for CIMA. This is a big outdoor stadium - looks to be 70% full. Brawl starts even before we do. No captain is given for the rudos - or we come in too late to see it. Ring gears are wearing even less for the occasion. Mr. Aguila is beating up Intocable (in his last TV match for the time being) while wearing a modified baseball cap. Modified so he can slip pony tails thru the top. Intocable takes a double faceslam and does not break his neck. Hijo de Tirantes is one ref - he's wearing his "69" suspenders for the occasion. Electroshock teases a comeback, only to get beaten down while just starting to sexy. Aguila tries to suplex CIMA on the raised walkway part of the TripleMania stage- Cima blocks, but eventually goes over. In the ring, tecnicos did get the comeback, but we missed it watching the suplex. Funny scene where Charly and Electro have each picked a side of the ring to try and get react - well, at least the fans on the floor. Kinda boring for the fans in the second deck, I'd guess. I need to type less, fast forward more. Electro shock has a Bucanero flak jacket outfit in a bad shade of brown. Everyone on the outside - countout out? Well, should be a DQ because Electro just chaired Charly, but they're not stopping it. Elector does it again, sending Charly into the announce desk, but the match goes on. Excuse to look at the announcers. Tecnicos getting individual paybacks. CIMA tries to get that suplex on the stage, but Aguila bails out on him on the way up, and the result is an awful looking spot. In the ring, Electroshock is teasing hitting the rudo referee forever so Charly can steal the chair away and - throw it out of the ring. Who's the tecnico? Of course, while watching this, we miss CIMA actually pulling off the suplex. They move on to Hator blocking a whip for no apparent reason - maybe he was afraid he was going to run into photographers? I've so not missed AAA. Intocable brings it back and actually goes for a submission! but we watch Charly get thrown over the barricade, into a bunch of chairs and somehow covered with powder. The rudo referee breaks up the hold, because he's a true AAA rudo. For no particular reason (except they planned this spot and it's supposed to look really neato, you see), Aguila and Intocable are climbing one of the light supports. I guess Aguila is trying to get away, and he thinks the light support takes him straight up to heaven. Unfortunately, it does not. Intocable catches up to him and kicks him a bit, causing Aguila to slowly and carefully climb down. The announcers are going crazy as they both safely climb back to the mat. CIMA's beating up Hator in the ring, and Intocable comes into help - but the one rule they decide to enforce is one man in the ring a time, so CIMA's booted. And the rudo referee is rudo some more, and I'm just about down with with this. Hator gets a small run on Intocable, brings a chair in, and ends up taking the drop toe hold into it. Intocable and Aguila have a spitting contest. Aguila's run ends with an Intocable headscissors. Hator back in, but not for long. Charly tries his turn and takes a bodyscissors bulldog. CIMA's turn to showcase, though we have to take a pause because Charly might be hurt. Nah, he's fine. Hator tricks CIMA into shaking hands with him, and they pull off the worst short clothesline. Exchange ends with a CIMA dropkick. CIMA gets the normal Mexican tecnico stuff on Aguila and Charly. Electroshocks' turn, with a lot of stalling to make some one care. Not me! Manson and Electro with a chop battle. Ropes. Manson gets in the 619 and two springboard dropkicks, but Electroshock shoves Hijo de Tirantes into the ropes to crotch him on the third one. Hator gets his trunks pulled, and that's too much for our eyes, although we certainly hear the reaction. Tope by Electro on him. Aguila and Intocable battle over a suplex and don't get anywhere. Lots of counters for counters sake. I can't tell if Intocable is trying for a slingshot tope con giro, racks himself and gamely adjusts it to a hanging headscissors, or if he just made his initial move a screwup, but it's a very weird spot to end the exchange. CIMA and Charly. Charly gets in a flapjack for two, as we see Juvi approaching the ring with a chair. I guess he's man about the whole X-Team break up. CIMA gets in a two count off a superkick. Juvi gets in the chair shot when Manson holds the ropes, and CIMA ends up giving him the Schwein (I think) for the win. (13:59) Electro beats up Charly some more post match for fun. Juvi hangs out with the tecnicos. 

Some guy talks. I didn't stop fast forwarding, but surely it's a semi-famous Mexican person.

Interview: Psicosis II, re: Nicho. The caption says LLL, and that wasn't clear before. Psicosis II says he's the only one, and will be the only one.

Interview: Histeria says - he wants revenge on Psicosis, I guess?

They actually recap the feud. Which is nice.  

Match 2: Nicho vs Psicosis II for the name of Psicosis in a Extreme Lucha match
Plaza De Toros Nuevo Progreso De Guadalajara, 05/15/05 

Winner: Histeria, who wasn't an officially participant in the match
Match Time: 17:06 but it felt like three forevers.
Notes: It's gotten much darker since the last match. Both bring a chair to the ring; they've got various props already set up at ringside. I don't think they're going to use the tables to officially sign a contract, you know? Nicho is announces as the Original Psicosis. They do announce it as an extreme match, so I guess that shuts me up.

This is a death feud, they've got a ladder leaning on the ropes, and this is the match which starts not with a brawl, but a headlock/off the ropes bit? I'm weirded out for a minute, then Psicosis gives Nicho a header into the ladder and we're good. Psicosis tries to play a game of Catch The Ladder, but Nicho apparently sucks at him, since he just gets hit at it. Are they going to do the ladder crotching spot? Of course! Nicho's not really in WWE till he gets to do that. Nicho gets control back when Psicosis goes for the tables too soon. Hope they got better tables this time. Ladder senton. Riding the ladder down onto Psicosis. Nicho starts to walk out thru the crowd (?) and Psicosis brings him back - only to whip him over the barricade. Okay. Actually, the table is just like a part of a wall, I guess. Psicosis is busy to bring it out, and gets sand (not powder - slow to realize they're in a bullring, and that's what on the ground) in the eyes. He gets control enough to carry the wall to parts unknown. He's carrying it past Nicho, and all the way throw the crowd to - well, let's see. I guess he's spotted some place where he can prop up, to use it to climb into the lower deck. Why he'd want to do it, I have no idea, but they seem to be playing this like a "first person to escape from the arena wins". Psicosis knocks down the wall as he leaves, so Nicho is forced to, uh, just use the stairs. Psicosis and Nicho fight as they boot climb a dark stairwell (because we can't see much). Nicho ditches Psicosis and gets out to the exterior walkway. Psicosis catches back up to him as Antonio Pena joins the announcers; I imagine he's there to explain what the actual rules are, or to make up some for the occasion. They re-enact the Benoit/Sullivan brawl into a bathroom, this time being a women's bathroom. Nicho gets a door upside his head a few times. You can tell there are people in stalls who aren't coming out right. Nicho uses a mop handle to the midsection, and a trash can to the head. Is that the ref? Is he asking Psicosis if he gives after a trash can to the head? Back outside the bathroom, Psicosis has walked to - another ring set up outside the arena?  This one has a cage. This is bizarre. Why is he trying to get in? Is this some sort of treasure hunt? I kinda expect some envelope to be hanging from a corner or something, but Nicho is instead pounding on the mat, and when the mat won't respond, he starts pulling up the canvas. I really really wish I was on the right drugs to understand what was supposed to be happening here. Actually, Nicho is actually ripping up the mat in half - and disappearing underneath. Psicosis, back alive, is climbing over the cage instead of actually using the door. Is he trying to surprise Nicho? Because it's a pretty unlikely thing. Nicho re-emerges from underneath the ring with - a key? Yes. Psicosis kills him with a top cage axhandle. He collects the key, and backdrops Nicho into the cage.

Digression: You know how every year, the WWE explains the rules of the Royal Rumble, even though everyone who's seen it before knows it by heart, and people with an IQ over 50 would get it within five minutes anyway. Well, I'm thinking, since he's not announcing on RAW or Heat anymore, maybe WWE can send Howard Finkel to AAA to carefully explain these completely bizarro matches. 

Psicosis is a moron, and elects to climb the cage instead of using the door. I think Nicho, who has to be wanting to catch Psicosis at this point if I understand things correctly and should be in some sort of hurry, is about to do the same. Back at the ring (a million miles away), Histeria has just entered. Maybe he thought the crowd was getting bored with no match and wanted to entertain them? He's about ten minutes away from the action, even though Psicosis is jogging back to the ring. He's slowed down as he gets back to the stands, as Nicho attacks him in pitch darkness - it took me a second to realize it was man with no shirt, and thus probably not a fan. Spotlight guy isn't really focused on keeping one on these guys, which does help. As Psicosis goes down the first deck stairs towards the floor, he's met by Histeria, and THEY fight. And for the most part, Histeria gets beat - Psicosis is going down the stairs regardless. They brawl on the first deck wall - it's about a 12 foot drop to the floor from there, I'd guess. They both end shoving each other over, and fall - thru the wall they set up how many minutes ago. They fall into nothing ness, so you can't really tell if it was a protected bump or what, though it was completely weird. Nicho takes a stupid crazy bump to get back to the floor for no real reason, except I guess to join in. We survive the damage, and it doesn't look they had much help, except from the sand floor. Nicho - gets a ladder? Not the key? Maybe he got the key and we didn't see. He bring the ladder all the way back to ringside, and as he's climbing the barricade, Psicosis drops him with a shot to the back. AH, Nicho did get the key - you can see the chain as Psicosis picks him up. Psicosis ends up charging into a backdrop, sending him over the floor. WE now take a look at something on a pole, over one of those corners - I guess that's what we're unlocking. Instead of climbing the pole, Nicho's going to use the ladder, and he's going to set up a piece of wall to lean off the ladder onto the apron for no real reason. The ladder ain't all that close to eh locked item, so I guess climbing isn't actually the plan there. Nicho brings Psicosis back in the ring. Nicho tease a suplex onto the wall, but Psicosis blocks and lands his own. Histeria's returned, and he takes advantage of both men being down. I guess anyone can be in this match if they want? Instead of, you know, taking the key and unlocking the box, Histeria chooses to go back outside of the ring, find all the props they set up before the match, throw them into the ring, and set them up. We really needed plastic tables. Psicosis gets in a chair dropkick on Nicho during this, but is still dead. Don't ask me how that works. I just work here. HIsteria makes a Super Table from a couple plastic tables and one big shiny pieces of plywood.  Meanwhile, Psicosis and Nicho fight like someone's not doing interior decorating behind them. Well, not as much as fight as Psicosis hits Nicho with the ladder a bunch, and Nicho acts punch drunk, then dead drunk. Psicosis grabs a ladder, leans it on the box corner, and starts to climb - setting himself up perfectly for a Histeria chair shot and fall backwards into the Super Table. Super Table breaks, though not impressively. Histeria gets the key. Will he give it to Nicho? He does! HUG! Histeria is Nicho's new best friend. Nicho, being a moron, decides he can't use the ladder helpfully set up for his use, throwing it outside the ring so he can climb up the ladder by hand. I hate this so much. Histeria's just going to boink him with a chair anyway. There you go. Nicho goes through the table dealio he set up before. I guess Histeria wanted to be cruel and win. Key is repossessed. Ladder is brought back in, and Histeria gets his big moment of climbing for the box, the whole visible crowd is looking in a different direction, perhaps more entertained by a fight in the crowd. Box unlocked. Histeria pulls out the piece of paper (ownership), and that's it. This was QUITE an event, for sure.

Nicho has to be stretchered out. He's convulsing! That's probably not good. 

After a break, we get a segment just of replays of the last match. 

Noti AAA
-
highlights from Arena Coliseo Monterrey
- Shocker! His first words about Konnan, so he's smart enough to start at the top. They talk about the bit with his dad getting worked over. He' s going to get revenge. 
- ads for the 06/01 (SLP), 06/18 (Torreon), 07/15 (Acapulco), 07/29 (CD. Madero, Tamaulipas)

One hour down. I'm not going to make three. 

Interview: Gronda II Luzbel introduces himself to the people. Oh wait, he's silver instead of Red, completely different. He does retain the painted on abs. He's on the side of AAA. 

Match 3: the Predator, Al Katrazz (c), Apocalypse vs Zorro (c), Juventud Guerrera, Luzbel
Plaza De Toros Nuevo Progreso De Guadalajara, 05/15/05 

Winner: Tecnicos (rudos DQ)
Match Time: 17:55
Other Match Notes: The Ugly Americans are indeed announced as such, waving a flag. And then they're announces as "Ugly American". In protest of UPW sending me press releases about their shows for all of eternity, I think I'm taking this match off. Actually, since everyone but Zorro doesn't seem to wrestle here anymore, and I don't have any faith in this being good, I think I'm being fair. Break after all entrances. 

Prematch, Ugly Americans tease eating tacos, but smash them instead, because tacos are bad and they're Ugly Americans. Rick Bassman has the whitest Spanish accent possible, it's great. Juvi's got the Mexican Flag, and he gets to yell for Mexico. Stalling. Zorro gets to talk. Juvi crotch chops Zorro's crotch for him, which he did earlier and it's really kinda questionable. 

Mexicans go on the offensive to start. Luzbel's big showcase as a new monster is against white guys who are visibly taller and bigger then him. Not the way I would've gone, but whatever. Zorro gets a Sharpshooter and Luzbel gets a horrible camel clutch on Apocalypse, but somehow that's not enough. Juvi adds in a top rope headbutt. Apocalypse easily walks it all off. Bassman, the manager here, is wearing a leather jacket with no shirt. I guess the idea is to make him look like a geek as a rudo, because boy is that working. Al and Juvi have a perfectly fine sequence except for Juvi having trouble going for a chokeslam on the first try, but they cover for that pretty well. Zorro and Apocalypse isn't as neat, but the UPW guys aren't embarrassing themselves here. Luzbel vs Predator. Luzbel is so short looking here.  But he does slam Predator, which makes him look strong. Suplex, onto so much, but Zorro comes into help with a double suplex. Predator misses a second rope legdrop. Zorro takes Luzbel's place, ducks a clothesline, superkicks Al, but gets killed by a Predator boot. Al walks the top ropes on an armbar, which is impressive and all, but a weird spot to go to when you've got a big advantage in size. They work Zorro over for ever, as if this a US style match, building to a hot tag. They do teases of Zorro making a tag, so that's exactly what we're going for. Predator gets a near fall off a Juvi Driver! I expected Juvi to react more on that, though we only saw him part of the time. Zorro eventually makes the hot tag to Juvi - and the crowd doesn't really react. Ha. When Juvi gets in moves, they do, but not to the tag. Juvi gets the best of Predator and Apocalypse, and hits Al with a chair as he comes in. Zorro uses his cane on Predator. This is all in full view of the referee. Juvi with a classic "big swing - and massive slow down before contact" chair shot on Predator. Zorro canes Apocalypse, who doesn't sell it more than a sec, because he has to take a chair shot too. Al reveres a whip, and Zorro gets a chair shot. Al gives Juvi a Bubba Cutter, Apocalypse uses a chair, and Predator has - what, a chained fist? Al chokes onto Zorro with his own cane. Bassman is in the ring, holding a chair but not really doing much with it. El Hijo del Tirantes becomes randomly to DQ the rudos for the cane choke, and that's it. (17:55) Is CMLL back yet? Please? 

Beatdown goes on, because why not? Al at least pretends he's hitting a home run with the cane.

Some guy from some some show says something about AA. Fast forward didn't stop for that. 

After the break, we get replays of the match. What an anticlimactic finish. It wasn't like Zorro was particularly even dying at that moment and the ref had to stop it before he suffered brain damage. He was just bored, I guess. I can believe that. Announcers gab.

Interview: Cibernetico promises problems for Vampiro. He's the Main Man.  It's a new day, and he's running things. Which is why Konnan is in this match and he's not, I guess. Actually, he doesn't like Konnan either, but since he's a bald titleless maskless man, the only thing he can get from him is Konnan's career. Cibernetico offers a match where if Konnan loses, he leaves Mexico forever and ever. Good lucha on that. 

Match 4: Konnan vs Vampiro
Plaza De Toros Nuevo Progreso De Guadalajara, 05/15/05 

Winner: Konnan
Match Time: 20:48
Other Match Notes: Konnan enters to noted heel anthem, Eye of the Tiger. He's wearing a Cuban Flag poncho. Konnan has X-Fly, who's also one of the Kumba Kids in his other identity, as his back up. Vampiro lets his music play a bit before entering. Vampiro is wearing a matador outfit, and bringing a Mexican flag and Antonio Pena as his corner man. Break.

After a few day break, I've developed no patience for this match. Not a good sign when the long Galavision spot includes absolutely no lucha, but that's about normal. Konnan talks before the match; he's not wrestling is Pena is out here. They already have the plunder set up in the ring, so this'll surely be a technical marvel. Pena talks! Vampiro talks! Announcers talk! Konnan jumps Vamp, finally. X-Fly's just going to interfere freely here. Vampiro runs thru a double clothesline, knocks his opponents outside, and gets in a pescado. X-Fly runs himself into a backdrop over the barricade, perhaps on purpose to serve as a distraction, perhaps on purpose to get seen. Konnan throws a chair at Vampiro, and this has to be the most powerful chair throw of all time, because Vampiro gets hit, backs up two steps, and seconds after the chair has hit him, the impact causes him to fall backwards over the barricade. One more, and I'm skipping to the finish. Lots of chair mayhem because we sure haven't gotten this on the show. Konnan ends up attacking a cameraman, it looks like, and then a security guy with more guys after him. X-Fly's recovered enough to help him out. As X-Fly runs interference, Konnan just leaves him to take care of five security guys - oh, no, he's just getting a chair so he can kill all the security people. X-Fly gets one two. Cameraman gets his camera knocked away too. Security is waling out. Nicho is walking in; if you've forgotten (understandable, because this show feels eight hours long), he got stretchered out of his match. He's looking completely fine here - maybe this a SHOOT situation and he's out to calm things down? Or just to yell at Konnan and grab a bag and leave? Okay, I'm in autopilot for real. Which is fine, because everyone's just setting up props and not actually wrestling - Vamp's recovering in the crowd, even. To be fair, crowd is loud. Vampiro sells being half dead, and I can't even remember what happened to him. He got hit with a chair a few times, but when does that keep someone down here. Spot, walk, set up next spot, spot. Not even particularly compelling spots. Lots of chair throwing. No shoe throwing. This IS Super Lucha, because the ref is outside the ring. But it is every lucha match ever, because Vampiro gets the comeback on a missed corner charge. Vampiro takes it up a notch by throwing a ladder! High stakes bingo. Oh, it's a two person version of the ladder crotch spot. Maybe that's what Nicho was yelling about. NICHO IS BACK! He's mad Vamp just stole his favorite spot. It's great, because we see Nicho running to the ring, and apparently he's just happy to get that far, not actually interested in coming in or anything. Vamp's not actually trying to win the match here (which is fair, because he's doing most of the spots to X-Fly - he's here to share the bumps with Konnan, though Konnan does take a suplex into a ladder.) Nicho eventually gets bored and decides to hit Vamp with a top rope kick to liven things up. I guess he's still LLL for another 56 minutes, too. Crowd does get loud for Nicho doing something. Too bad Vampiro has no friends. Everyone takes turn hammering Vampiro into a gigantic ironing board they've got set up in a corner. (I don't know what that actually is.) Konnan goes back to getting revenge on cameramen. Some of the security guys were obvious trainees, but I'm not so sure about this guy. If he's a trainee, he needs his money back. Random break, not really set up at all. (8:37)

Back, so Nicho can put Vamp in a camel clutch and bite him in the head. Hope nothing interesting happens as I skip ahead. Vamp is bleeding. They list the match again, in case you forget what this was supposed to be. No one's in any particular hurry here. Well, I am, but no one cares about me. Vampiro turns it around by jumping over a drop toe hold and throwing a chair and I hate this promotion so much. X-Fly waits 10 seconds before doing anything about it. Nicho gets a spin kick + chair in the head, thanks for showing up. Vampiro randomly stands around long enough for Konnan to get back control, and then X-Fly gives Konnan powder to use on Vampiro. Why did they save the powder till now? 2 count. Vamp randomly turns it around, and accidentally falls into a low blow headbutt. Both nearly get counted down for for a three count without touching each other, which is new. Vamp uses brass knuckles, and Nicho and X-Fly eventually figure they ought to break it up. Of course, their double teaming goes bad before not too long. Konnan uses a Tombstone on Vampiro. If this doesn't get the pin, I'm done with this match. one two I'm done. Actually, the one thing I'll say is at least they're smart enough to realize the table they brought to the ring is a bad one to send one thru, table on fire or not. The one the bring out isn't great, but it's not likely to kill someone. Also great is the table not really breaking but Vampiro's neck almost breaking, and yet it being a two count. Nicho tries to do on a backdrop to the floor for no particular reason - I wouldn't be doing that if I had a WWE deal but whatever. And then after all the mayhem, Konnan puts on a weird choke hold for the winner. (12:11, 20:48 shown)

Break. Replays. Break.

Vignette: a

Match 5: Chessman, Cibernetico (c), Fuerza Guerrera vs Latin Lover, Octagon, La Parka Jr. (c)
Plaza De Toros Nuevo Progreso De Guadalajara, 05/15/05 

Winner: Tecnicos
Match Time: 11:08
Other Match Notes: Somehow, we come in at the tail end of the entrance on this match. It's not like we don't have time for it all.

Beatdown to start. They have the partners listed as surprises even though, by this point, we can see them fighting. Fuerza's ribs are heavily taped. Octagon's headband is tried to the top rope, and Fuerza beats him down. That's at least a neat ideas. Chessman has changed his outfit; he traded in the Kane outfit for a Red Star one. Octagon does not appear to have been training hard for his comeback, unless he trains hard at the same place Porky does. Comeback starts on a random whip, with way too much time left so I guess this isn't really going anywhere. Sure enough, they settle down to a normal match, though a "one tecnico beats all rudos" section. Latin wipes out Chessman with a corkscrew pescado. More wackiness includes a four man star, Octagon nailing Fuerza with a tope, Parka Jr. not doing quite as good with his tope on Cibernetico, and Latin Lover's tights being pulled down, though we don't get to see it. That's fine. For no particular reason, That Guy runs in, and I can't remember who he is. Poncho de Nigirs? Sure. He throws a cup of something in Chessman's face, Latin Lover gives Chessman the Code Red (which is less impressive with each person who can do it), and that's the ballgame. (11:08) Welcome to the only place besides a strip club or a gay bar where they still play Backstreet Boys, so Latin and Poncho can dance. Parka dancing with them isn't enough to save it. For no particular reason, the Ugly Americans are out and circling the ring. No Bassman? Ah, there he is. X-Team is out after them, so you know what Charly Manson looks like without the makeup. Espectro Jr.? Are they just going to send everyone out? Pretty much, at least rudo wise. Pirata Morgan, Sangre Chicana and the rest of their crew, including Fuerza back again. There's a brawl, the Ugly Americans are pretty easily ran off by the assorted rudos, and Fureza and Octagon getting back into it for a sec. That was pointless. This was all pointless.

Break. Replays. Break. DONE. Thank god.